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There are two hands that can beat a royal flush. Jack Bauer's right hand and Jack Bauer's left hand.
When someone asked Jack Bauer if he was afraid of James Bond, he replied "What does 'afraid' mean?"
It takes you 24 weeks just to watch what Jack Bauer does in a single day.
Some people see the glass as half full. Others see it as half empty. Jack Bauer see the glass as a deadly weapon.
Jack Bauer once stepped into quicksand. The quicksand couldn't escape and nearly drowned.
Jack Bauer was once charged with attempted murder in Los Angeles County, but the judge dropped all charges because Jack Bauer never "attempts" murder.
There are three leading causes of death among terrorists. The first two are Jack Bauer, and the third one is heart attack from hearing Jack Bauer is coming for them.
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