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If you do not know how to do it yourself, or your host won't or doesn't know how, you should pay somebody to optimize your server for you if you're serving more than a million impressions a day.
Reflected installed it for us -- as they do everything -- and had all kind of tricks to make it run smoothly and effortlessly. Has never let us down. The install on Reflected runs much better than the install I did myself when I first started playing around with it a couple of years ago.
You're right about treating everything separately. I learned that through trial and error myself.
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