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The Irish girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned."
"What is it, child?"
The girl said, "Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am."
The priest turned, took a good look at the girl, and said, "My dear, I have good news. That isn't a sin - it's only a mistake."
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My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business.
He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce! 
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