Quote:
Originally posted by Platinum Rinaldo
Well since My foulmouth would probably expel me from any future movie review offers, You have nothing to worry about. I'm not going anywhere fucktoy
|
ok, let me give it a try so you can flame my ass:
Going in to Blade: Trinity I had my reservations. The second installment was a big disappointment and the trailers for part 3 weren't promising. This time Blade (Wesley Snipes) has two side-kicks (read: eye candy to sell more tickets).
The first is Ryan Reynolds (aka Van Wilder) who the producers obviously felt was a critical component in adding some humour to the mix. As anyone in Hollywood will tell you, action sells okay, comedy better. But both? Blockbuster.
The other is Jessica Biel who plays a bow and arrow-toting bad "chick". This is the new rage in Hollywood after Trinity (coincidence?) in the Matrix movies got so much press.
Okay, how about the story. It's fairly predictable. Bad vampires awake the grand daddy of all nightcrawlers and presumably after a few thousand years in a sand pit, he's a little disgruntled.
He is apparently the original vampire and father figure to every blood sucker to follow. The only problem is he looks and dresses more like a don juan/stud-muffin you'd find in working the crowd in a SoBe night club. Intimidating? No. Not even with the deeeep voice overs.
So Blade decides he better do away with Vampire Sr. and the fight is on. Along the way a serum is invented which will wipe out the vampires for good - and presumably any sequels.
The catch is, they have to mix it with the hunk's blood ... so Blade and the Grecian cabana boy meet in a rather dull fight in the climax.
Reynolds get's the chuckles with one-liners and sarcasm, a little too much perhaps: I'd say by the 1-hour mark you want to slap him yourself. Throw in a cute chow-chow with killer fangs and Triple H and the one area this movie beats it's prequels is in laughs.
The other notable is the appearance of adult industry Icon Platinum Rinaldo in a cameo. You'll blink if you miss it but look for the scene in the goth store and outside the window there he is breaking into someone's parked Gremlin. Not sure if that was actually supposed to be in the film but he'll take his 15 minutes anyway he can.
