So I have a confession to make... I'm a guppy! aters and trolls welcome.

[sperbonzo]

So my wife and my 4 month old son left for Durbin, South Africa, to visit her family, on Jan 8th. I had to stay here in Miami because I had some big meetings that I couldn't miss. I won't be joining them until Jan 30th, and then we will have two weeks together (I have a couple of bank meetings in South Africa also, but still we will at least be together...), and then we come back together on Feb 14th.

The confession is this... I miss my son so much it's killing me. Obviously I miss Vino (my wife), very very much, but the pain of missing my son, Akiva, is like nothing I've ever felt before. It's just amazing how much space a baby takes up in your life. They take up physical space with all the baby stuff, they take up mental space with all the things you have to think about every time you go somewhere or do something, and they take up space emotionally in a way that I could never imagine before.

I find myself wandering around the house sometimes, and it's just so damn quiet! I've had to put all of his stuff back into his room so I wouldn't have to look at it. I find myself thinking about him all the damn time.

When we get on skype, he looks at me, and hears my voice, and starts smiling and gurgling at me, and I'm smiling back, and talking to him. Then after a couple of minutes he is expecting me to pick him up, and of course I can't. So he starts to fuss and cry, and I really want to pick him up and soothe him, but of course I'm 8000 miles away.... It actually makes my chest hurt, not being able to hold him.

I've gotten to the point where I don't even want to see him on skype, it just makes it worse.

I'm a total guppy as far as he is concerned. It's just ridiculous. Obviously I miss my wife alot, it's three weeks apart (longest ever for us), but somehow it's different, since she is a fully functioning adult able to take care of herself... He is just this helpless little guy that only just learned how to roll over last week and won't be crawling for another month.

[Phoenix]

man up...you will need to get used to being away from him

i know its rough, wait until he is 2 and you have to say goodbye for a month

damn

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by Phoenix

man up...you will need to get used to being away from him

i know its rough, wait until he is 2 and you have to say goodbye for a month

damn

Dude, at this point I'm thinking that I'm going to bring him to the Phoenix forum, (Vino usually comes with me anyway, so I'll bring them both), and trips where I can't bring him, I'm not going to be away for longer than 1 to 2 weeks, max.



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[Fletch XXX]

i can relate. i was a different person before i had my daughter, and now, if im away from her even just for 5 hours i begin to miss her. If i see an item she was playing with or left out, it make me miss her presence when i dont hear her little voice. or her footsteps running across floor like i do now as i type...

i can totally relate, im feeling you on this thread.

good dads should all feel this way. imho

props to being one of the few brother.

[topshemales]

I miss my family even if they go somewhere for a day,its normal.

[spazlabz]

I feel for you. I also hope it never gets easier for you to be apart from him until he is a grown man with his own family. My oldest son is in college and I miss him every day. I think that the missing them is the most important part and helps us to appreciate them and the time we get to share with them

[barcodes]

Just kidding... It's normal for you to love your son.
Lot of people who never had a dad or one who didn't care.
It's a good thing.

[EddyTheDog]

You make me feel broody - Its the one thing I regret about being gay.

Me and a female friend even had a drunken night armed with a turkey baster, a dildo and a pic of Brad Pitt.

Thank god that didnt work out! I can't even look after myself....

[Zoxxa]

"I had some big meetings that I couldn't miss" - This is never true.

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by Zoxxa

"I had some big meetings that I couldn't miss" - This is never true.

I know what you are saying, but the bottom line is that my business is such that I must have meetings and travel. I was in Panama for 3 days when he was two months old and I found myself looking at pics of him on my iphone after only 12 hours away from him...

The fact is that I actually get a lot more time with him than most men get to have. I even bring him into my office a couple of times a week so he can sit in his little lounger next to my desk and we can grin at each other, inbetween me writing emails and him playing with his octopus toy.

It really is the nature of my business, and I have to support my family, so..... I'm kind of stuck.


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[Zoxxa]

Originally Posted by sperbonzo

I know what you are saying, but the bottom line is that my business is such that I must have meetings and travel. I was in Panama for 3 days when he was two months old and I found myself looking at pics of him on my iphone after only 12 hours away from him...

The fact is that I actually get a lot more time with him than most men get to have. I even bring him into my office a couple of times a week so he can sit in his little lounger next to my desk and we can grin at each other, inbetween me writing emails and him playing with his octopus toy.

It really is the nature of my business, and I have to support my family, so..... I'm kind of stuck.


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Oh I know, I am not saying you are a bad father by any means.

Just saying I don't believe thats ever a valid excuse. You sound intelligent, I am sure you would do fine at providing and supporting your family another way if needed.

[PR_Glen]

Originally Posted by Fletch XXX

good dads should all feel this way. imho

i whole heartedly disagree with this respectfully ;)

I just think there can be a happy medium when it comes to raising kids, obsession doesn't make for better parenting. I think its safe to say we all do this in the first few months, especially with our first born, so I can understand where sperbonzo is coming from here.

[Fletch XXX]

Originally Posted by PR_Glen

i whole heartedly disagree with this respectfully ;)

I just think there can be a happy medium when it comes to raising kids, obsession doesn't make for better parenting. I think its safe to say we all do this in the first few months, especially with our first born, so I can understand where sperbonzo is coming from here.

k you got me, single child first one. she gonna break my heart i just know it hahaha

all good, was just feeling the thread, i enjoy being home so much with my little girl and regularly acknowledge how lucky I am to work from home and be able to spend this valuable and precious time with her as she grows (she just turned 2) most dads are away 40+ hour weeks at the office, wheres Im barely gone. I have friends who travel for work and are gone at least two weeks out of each month, some 3 weeks...I appreciate and value that time tremendously.

ok, now back to the regular gfy posting

;)

[Operator]

Too much text

[epitome]

Nothing makes me happier than a proud and involved father.

Nothing makes me sadder than a deadbeat dad.

Keep doing what you're doing...

[RyuLion]

Originally Posted by epitome

Nothing makes me happier than a proud and involved father.

Nothing makes me sadder than a deadbeat dad.

Keep doing what you're doing...

Period.

My respects to Micheal, I knew he was gonna be a good father.

[candyflip]

Originally Posted by Fletch XXX

k you got me, single child first one. she gonna break my heart i just know it hahaha

all good, was just feeling the thread, i enjoy being home so much with my little girl and regularly acknowledge how lucky I am to work from home and be able to spend this valuable and precious time with her as she grows (she just turned 2) most dads are away 40+ hour weeks at the office, wheres Im barely gone. I have friends who travel for work and are gone at least two weeks out of each month, some 3 weeks...I appreciate and value that time tremendously.

ok, now back to the regular gfy posting

;)

I feel the same way. Though I'm home by myself with 3 of them (3 and under) 3 days a week.

By the end of those days, I'm pulling my hair out. I love them to death, but man can they suck the life out of you.

[Sharky]

Michael, I know how you feel. Just know that you will see her soon, and she is always coming home to you.

I went through similar situations when my daughter was first born. It was the worse when I went through my divorce, my daughter was 6 and my son just turned 1. The hardest part of a divorce with kids is going from seeing them everyday to every other week. I tried to work it out with their mom 5-6 times because I couldn't bare to be away from them. After the divorce was final I retained 50% custody (week on, week off) until my ex-wife moved out of state and left me with them full time. Since then I've only been away from them for 2 weeks at most. It's still hard, but not as hard as it was when they were babies and relied on me so much!

Give Vino and Akiva a big hug and kiss from me. You have a great family and are very lucky!

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by RyuLion

Period.

My respects to Micheal, I knew he was gonna be a good father.

Thanks Alex.



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[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by Sharky

my daughter was 6 and my son just turned 1. The hardest part of a divorce with kids is going from seeing them everyday to every other week. I tried to work it out with their mom 5-6 times because I couldn't bare to be away from them.

Wow Mikey, that must have sucked beyond belief! I can only imagine

Originally Posted by Sharky

Give Vino and Akiva a big hug and kiss from me. You have a great family and are very lucky! .

Thanks bro, I think so too!

I hope we get to see you guys soon!!


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[Deej]

Good Stuff!

[RyuLion]

Originally Posted by Deej

Good Stuff!

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by Deej

Good Stuff!

Deej, your sig is rockin!

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[DarkJedi]

jasus, stop being such a fucking pussy

[sperbonzo]

Originally Posted by DarkJedi

jasus, stop being such a fucking pussy

FINALLY!! THANK YOU!!!



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[TurboAngel]

Awwww you are a good dad!