Worst Shark Tank EVER - GoFuckYourself.com

The Porn Nerd · 03-02-2015, 06:25 PM

Disclaimer: I LOVE Shark Tank. LOVE IT. Total addiction. But I just saw the biggest piece of Internet bullshit I have ever seen. We, as Adult webmasters, who wonder what the heck "mainstream" really is all about, this episode of Shark Tank proves exactly what it is:

BULLSHIT.

Guy comes in, does a little dance, and is seeking 10K for 25% of his "company" (meaning he thinks it's worth 40K). What's his "company"? I Want To Draw A Cat For You. People write in to his website, describe the kind of cat they want drawn, and this fucktard sits down at his kitchen table every night and scratches out a stick figure cat drawing. He sells them for $9.99 and has sold about a thousand of them over a year's time.

So guess what happens? Mark Cuban offers him 25K - or 2.5 times what the shmuck is seeking - for 33% of his "company". Dude accepts (duh) and he and Cuban do a little cat dance together.

The cat drawing dude made a couple hundred a week doing this bullshit and now he has a business worthy of being on Shark Tank? Look for The Porn Nerd on there soon, pitching the sharks on his wild-ass outsourced 'profit margins' and the 'scaleability' of his growing Internet media network.

Someone please shoot me.

johnnyloadproductions · 03-02-2015, 06:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

Someone please shoot me.

420 · 03-02-2015, 06:39 PM

Jelly cause you can't draw teh kitteh?

johnnyloadproductions · 03-02-2015, 06:45 PM

Guess he can still scale it, low skill and just fraudulently claim all the drawings are his.

kane · 03-02-2015, 06:49 PM

I remember that. If you do a search for him you will see that in addition to roughly 10,000 orders for cat drawings he and Mark have launched 7 new businesses all that started witht he cat drawing. Not too shabby.

JD · 03-02-2015, 06:50 PM

yeah i saw that one. shit blew my mind. I honestly think the producers put the occasional random shit in front of them for publicity. In Mark Cubans case 40k is like me throwing a nickel into fountain. If the wish comes true... fuck yeah. If not... oh well I have millions of nickels.

The Porn Nerd · 03-02-2015, 06:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kane

I remember that. If you do a search for him you will see that in addition to roughly 10,000 orders for cat drawings he and Mark have launched 7 new businesses all that started witht he cat drawing. Not too shabby.

Wow. What a country is all I can say. Now I REALLY want someone to shoot me. LOL

Here I just drew this:

Pay me.

woj · 03-02-2015, 06:55 PM

it seems half the time they invest in the business just because they feel sorry for the entrepreneur...

420 · 03-02-2015, 06:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

Wow. What a country is all I can say. Now I REALLY want someone to shoot me. LOL

Here I just drew this:

Pay me.

I will buy a drawing* of your penis for ~$3.50

*hand drawn on paper

epitome · 03-02-2015, 07:06 PM

Similar to American Idol with their ridiculous auditions, the producers of Shark Tank throw in crazy stuff to mix things up and keep the show interesting. It's TV.

slapass · 03-02-2015, 07:25 PM

It has blown up - Shark Tank Success Stories: IWantToDrawACatForYou.com

TheSquealer · 03-02-2015, 07:54 PM

Cuban is smart. Products that are on that show blow up. He did 9k with zero press. I'm sure Cuban will make money on his investment

Freedom6995 · 03-02-2015, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

Wow. What a country is all I can say. Now I REALLY want someone to shoot me. LOL

Here I just drew this:

Pay me.

Smoke some of the good stuff and do a Siamese kitty for us.

VikingMan · 03-02-2015, 09:59 PM

fucking cats

420 · 03-02-2015, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VikingMan

fucking cats

Can you make more money drawing dogs?

altmman · 03-02-2015, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

Guy comes in, does a little dance, and is seeking 10K for 25% of his "company" (meaning he thinks it's worth 40K). What's his "company"? I Want To Draw A Cat For You. People write in to his website, describe the kind of cat they want drawn, and this fucktard sits down at his kitchen table every night and scratches out a stick figure cat drawing. He sells them for $9.99 and has sold about a thousand of them over a year's time.

People love shit like that. Custom cat pictures from a (now) popular fun and goofy person. The guy who did TheOnion is a multi millionaire now from shitty drawings of cats/animal/people.
Love his story, lost his job, had nothing, now he built a brand out of fun and silliness.
Plus getting on Shark Tank means it will be in front of millions of people who, i bet 2% of them will buy a cat picture and 5% will post about it on social media.

Harmonizer · 03-02-2015, 10:34 PM

I just watched the shark tank with the original patent holders of guitar hero. The sharks kicked them out and I was like... wtf. Sometimes they are just arrogant and really, really stingy.

CurrentlySober · 03-03-2015, 12:51 AM

i could draw the cats poo?

TheDA · 03-03-2015, 03:46 AM

I guess Shark Tank is the US version of Dragon's Den?

poncabare · 03-03-2015, 01:36 PM

fuck cats

CaptainHowdy · 03-03-2015, 01:39 PM

Never seen a bad Shark Tank episode ...

The Porn Nerd · 03-03-2015, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainHowdy

Never seen a bad Shark Tank episode ...

Entire bad episode? No. Terrible segment? Yes. LOL

Drawing cats = success = The Porn Nerd = crying.

Oh the humanity! Or, the catmanity!!

PS: I want to marry and spank (not in that order) Lori Grenier. LOL

CaptainHowdy · 03-03-2015, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

Entire bad episode? No. Terrible segment? Yes. LOL

Drawing cats = success = The Porn Nerd = crying.

Oh the humanity! Or, the catmanity!!

PS: I want to marry and spank (not in that order) Lori Grenier. LOL

I'm someone who doesn't know to make money , so I see it almost as science fiction.

czarina · 03-03-2015, 02:18 PM

I don't watch TV so I have no idea what's happening here ;P

femdomdestiny · 03-03-2015, 02:26 PM

oh...I've read: Worst Star Trek EVER

TeenCat · 03-03-2015, 02:37 PM

anybody said fart tank?

Ross · 03-03-2015, 02:57 PM

The dude done an AMA recently on reddit, quite interesting. IamA terrible artist who has sold 18,794 pieces of original art. AMA! : IAmA

420 · 03-03-2015, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TeenCat

anybody said fart tank?

clickity click · 03-03-2015, 03:07 PM

Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k???
The extra 15k is for the additional 8%?

Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

TeenCat · 03-03-2015, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 420

hehehe lol!

420 · 03-03-2015, 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clickity click

Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k???
The extra 15k is for the additional 8%?

Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

That didn't make sense to me either. Guy valued his company at 40k but Cuban values the company at 75k and over pays.

Actually, the drawings aren't bad.

The Porn Nerd · 03-03-2015, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 420

That didn't make sense to me either. Guy valued his company at 40k but Cuban values the company at 75k and over pays.

Actually, the drawings aren't bad.

This is what I am saying (and what drove me to create this thread). If Cuban is THAT easily entertained then I've got some porn to sell him.

Hey Mark - $200,000 for 2% of my company. You in?

brassmonkey · 03-03-2015, 03:51 PM

i tried to buy from some people on there pure assholes.

Wendy-Etology · 03-03-2015, 05:47 PM

Meow meow meow

The Porn Nerd · 03-03-2015, 06:04 PM

OK now JEFF FOXWORTHY is a Guest Shark on tonight's show.

WTF MAN SERIOUSLY????? JEFF FOXWORTHY???

Shoot me, roll me in pig fat and grill my stunned ass. PLEASE.

The Porn Nerd · 03-03-2015, 06:51 PM

OK Foxworthy is quite good, and he is definitely a smart fellow.

Man, I am dumber than Jeff Foxworthy. LOL

mineistaken · 03-03-2015, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clickity click

Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k???
The extra 15k is for the additional 8%?

Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

I am not sure how stocks works in US, but in some countries there are few thresholds, for example 10%, 30%. That means that you can have MUCH more "power' (for example in requesting documents or other stuff) if you hold 11% instead of 9% or if you hold 31% instead of 29%.
maybe that was the case here - 33% gives you more of something else on top of those extra 8%.

Sly · 03-03-2015, 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Porn Nerd

OK Foxworthy is quite good, and he is definitely a smart fellow.

Man, I am dumber than Jeff Foxworthy. LOL

Jeff Foxworthy has built an empire on his "redneck" routine. He has helped several others build empires as well. He is no fool.

kb24 · 03-03-2015, 08:34 PM

Sometimes you don't need to make a deal on shark tank all you need is exposure..I did see this pitch ehh it is what it is.

Drake · 03-03-2015, 10:13 PM

Haven't seen this episode but Shark Tank is one of my favorite shows. Must be more to the deal!

The Porn Nerd · 03-03-2015, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sly

Jeff Foxworthy has built an empire on his "redneck" routine. He has helped several others build empires as well. He is no fool.

Agreed. The story I heard is Foxworthy wanted a career in standup comedy but he was working for IBM. He's a coder by trade, or something tech. Anyway he saved his pennies and gave himself X number of years to make it (like 5). I think Ray Romano did something similar.

Foxworthy has also done great stuff with kids (charities, books, tv shows). Much respect for him. Just a bit of a shock to see him on Shark Tank, that's all.

AmeliaG · 03-03-2015, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ross

The dude done an AMA recently on reddit, quite interesting. IamA terrible artist who has sold 18,794 pieces of original art. AMA! : IAmA

Thanks for the link!

Crazy that the guy got a chance like that, had six figures rolling in, and decided he should just screw Mark Cuban because it was a lot of work.

TheDA · 03-04-2015, 04:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clickity click

Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k???
The extra 15k is for the additional 8%?

Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

It's happened before on Dragon's Den too.

clickity click · 03-04-2015, 04:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheDA

It's happened before on Dragon's Den too.

Has it? Didn't know.

RazorSharpe · 03-04-2015, 07:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clickity click

Has it? Didn't know.

Most certainly has ... look up a product called Magnamole (I think) ....

The Porn Nerd · 03-04-2015, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmeliaG

Thanks for the link!

Crazy that the guy got a chance like that, had six figures rolling in, and decided he should just screw Mark Cuban because it was a lot of work.

How did he screw Cuban? I'm assuming not in a good way. LOL

mineistaken · 03-04-2015, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clickity click

Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k???
The extra 15k is for the additional 8%?

Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

Or maybe simply the guy was ready to give up only 25% and did not need extra cash that much, so MC had to sweeten the deal by offering more per share in order to get 33% instead of 25%.

Just a thought without seeing the episode. Maybe they could elaborate on things like that.

DVTimes · 03-04-2015, 02:53 PM

do you remember those stone pets from years ago.

Jim_Gunn · 03-04-2015, 10:06 PM

You must be watching the repeats on CNBC. Those are some old episodes that you are talking about with Jeff Foxworthy and the I Want To Draw A Cat For You guy. I love Shark Tank too. I'm assuming you are watching the new eps on ABC as well?

Dragons Den UK is airing episodes of their twelfth season right now as is the Canadian version of Dragons Den in their ninth season. I catch those online through my VPN on the BBC and CBC web sites. They even started up a Shark Tank Australia edition a few weeks ago that is also pretty entertaining. I'm not sure if the Irish version of Dragons Den is coming back for a seventh season however.

carpocratian · 03-04-2015, 10:36 PM

Jeff Foxworthy was a regular on Shark Tank years ago.

03-02-2015, 06:25 PM	#1
The Porn Nerd Living The Dream Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Inside a Monitor Posts: 19,635	Worst Shark Tank EVER Disclaimer: I LOVE Shark Tank. LOVE IT. Total addiction. But I just saw the biggest piece of Internet bullshit I have ever seen. We, as Adult webmasters, who wonder what the heck "mainstream" really is all about, this episode of Shark Tank proves exactly what it is: BULLSHIT. Guy comes in, does a little dance, and is seeking 10K for 25% of his "company" (meaning he thinks it's worth 40K). What's his "company"? I Want To Draw A Cat For You. People write in to his website, describe the kind of cat they want drawn, and this fucktard sits down at his kitchen table every night and scratches out a stick figure cat drawing. He sells them for $9.99 and has sold about a thousand of them over a year's time. So guess what happens? Mark Cuban offers him 25K - or 2.5 times what the shmuck is seeking - for 33% of his "company". Dude accepts (duh) and he and Cuban do a little cat dance together. The cat drawing dude made a couple hundred a week doing this bullshit and now he has a business worthy of being on Shark Tank? Look for The Porn Nerd on there soon, pitching the sharks on his wild-ass outsourced 'profit margins' and the 'scaleability' of his growing Internet media network. Someone please shoot me. __________________ My Affiliate Programs: Porn Nerd Cash \| Porn Showcase \| Aggressive Gold Over 90 paysites to promote! Now on Teams: peabodymedia

03-02-2015, 06:55 PM	#8
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	it seems half the time they invest in the business just because they feel sorry for the entrepreneur... __________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

03-02-2015, 07:54 PM	#12
TheSquealer Mayor of Thneedville Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 25,428	Cuban is smart. Products that are on that show blow up. He did 9k with zero press. I'm sure Cuban will make money on his investment __________________ . Yes, fewer illegal immigrants working equates to more job opportunities for American citizens. Rochard

03-03-2015, 12:51 AM	#18
CurrentlySober Too lazy to wipe my ass Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: A Public Bathroom Posts: 38,688	i could draw the cats poo? __________________ My AI Handywork... My Dream Gal... XXX 👁️ 👍️ 💩

03-03-2015, 03:46 AM	#19
TheDA Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 4,665	I guess Shark Tank is the US version of Dragon's Den? __________________ Sharleen Spiteri - 1989 - In The Ass

03-02-2015, 06:39 PM	#3
420 cuck Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 11,571	Jelly cause you can't draw teh kitteh?

03-02-2015, 06:45 PM	#4
johnnyloadproductions Account Shutdown Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Gone Posts: 3,611	Guess he can still scale it, low skill and just fraudulently claim all the drawings are his.

03-02-2015, 06:49 PM	#5
kane Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: portland, OR Posts: 20,684	I remember that. If you do a search for him you will see that in addition to roughly 10,000 orders for cat drawings he and Mark have launched 7 new businesses all that started witht he cat drawing. Not too shabby.

03-02-2015, 06:50 PM	#6
JD Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 22,651	yeah i saw that one. shit blew my mind. I honestly think the producers put the occasional random shit in front of them for publicity. In Mark Cubans case 40k is like me throwing a nickel into fountain. If the wish comes true... fuck yeah. If not... oh well I have millions of nickels.

03-02-2015, 07:06 PM	#10
epitome So Fucking Lame Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: St. Petersburg, FL Posts: 12,156	Similar to American Idol with their ridiculous auditions, the producers of Shark Tank throw in crazy stuff to mix things up and keep the show interesting. It's TV.

03-02-2015, 07:25 PM	#11
slapass Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Earth Posts: 14,625	It has blown up - Shark Tank Success Stories: IWantToDrawACatForYou.com

03-02-2015, 09:59 PM	#14
VikingMan Exploiting human weakness Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: next to a salmon stream Posts: 6,576	fucking cats

03-02-2015, 10:34 PM	#17
Harmonizer So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2015 Posts: 66	I just watched the shark tank with the original patent holders of guitar hero. The sharks kicked them out and I was like... wtf. Sometimes they are just arrogant and really, really stingy.

03-03-2015, 01:36 PM	#20
poncabare Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: carmel Posts: 2,552	fuck cats

03-03-2015, 01:39 PM	#21
CaptainHowdy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Happy in the dark. Posts: 93,684	Never seen a bad Shark Tank episode ... __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Windows VPS now available Great for TSS, Nifty Stats, remote work, virtual assistants, etc.

03-03-2015, 02:18 PM	#24
czarina Webmaster Extraordinaire Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: A beautiful beach... Posts: 10,748	I don't watch TV so I have no idea what's happening here ;P

03-03-2015, 02:26 PM	#25
femdomdestiny Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 5,176	oh...I've read: Worst Star Trek EVER __________________ Femdom Destiny -------------------------------------------- ICQ: 463-630-426 email: webmaster(at)femdomdestiny.com

03-03-2015, 02:37 PM	#26
TeenCat Too lazy to set a koala Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: CZ/EU forever! Posts: 16,139	anybody said fart tank? __________________ 6bot / Coming again very soon! Svit Zlin Radio 24/7!

03-03-2015, 02:57 PM	#27
Ross Ik ben een aap Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Traffic Force Towers, Canada! Posts: 18,874	The dude done an AMA recently on reddit, quite interesting. IamA terrible artist who has sold 18,794 pieces of original art. AMA! : IAmA

03-03-2015, 03:07 PM	#29
clickity click So Fecking Bummed Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2014 Posts: 3,682	Why would a guy come in for 10k but be offered 25k??? The extra 15k is for the additional 8%? Sounds like Dragons Den but that shit would never happen.

03-03-2015, 03:51 PM	#33
brassmonkey Pay It Forward Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Yo Mama House Posts: 77,258	i tried to buy from some people on there pure assholes. __________________ TRUMP 2025 KEKAW!!! - The Laken Riley Act Is Law! DACA ENDED - SUPPORT AZ HCR 2060 52R - email: brassballz-at-techie.com

03-03-2015, 05:47 PM	#34
Wendy-Etology Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2015 Posts: 274	Meow meow meow

03-03-2015, 06:04 PM	#35
The Porn Nerd Living The Dream Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Inside a Monitor Posts: 19,635	OK now JEFF FOXWORTHY is a Guest Shark on tonight's show. WTF MAN SERIOUSLY????? JEFF FOXWORTHY??? Shoot me, roll me in pig fat and grill my stunned ass. PLEASE. __________________ My Affiliate Programs: Porn Nerd Cash \| Porn Showcase \| Aggressive Gold Over 90 paysites to promote! Now on Teams: peabodymedia

03-03-2015, 06:51 PM	#36
The Porn Nerd Living The Dream Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Inside a Monitor Posts: 19,635	OK Foxworthy is quite good, and he is definitely a smart fellow. Man, I am dumber than Jeff Foxworthy. LOL __________________ My Affiliate Programs: Porn Nerd Cash \| Porn Showcase \| Aggressive Gold Over 90 paysites to promote! Now on Teams: peabodymedia

03-03-2015, 08:34 PM	#39
kb24 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 108	Sometimes you don't need to make a deal on shark tank all you need is exposure..I did see this pitch ehh it is what it is. __________________ Sell Health - #1 Anti Aging Affiliate Program Wealthy Affiliate Learn How To Make Money Online

03-03-2015, 10:13 PM	#40
Drake Hello world! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 12,508	Haven't seen this episode but Shark Tank is one of my favorite shows. Must be more to the deal!

03-04-2015, 02:53 PM	#48
DVTimes xxx Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: UK Posts: 31,547	do you remember those stone pets from years ago. __________________ The Affiliate Program

03-04-2015, 10:06 PM	#49
Jim_Gunn Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Where The Teens Are Posts: 5,702	You must be watching the repeats on CNBC. Those are some old episodes that you are talking about with Jeff Foxworthy and the I Want To Draw A Cat For You guy. I love Shark Tank too. I'm assuming you are watching the new eps on ABC as well? Dragons Den UK is airing episodes of their twelfth season right now as is the Canadian version of Dragons Den in their ninth season. I catch those online through my VPN on the BBC and CBC web sites. They even started up a Shark Tank Australia edition a few weeks ago that is also pretty entertaining. I'm not sure if the Irish version of Dragons Den is coming back for a seventh season however.

03-04-2015, 10:36 PM	#50
carpocratian Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2014 Posts: 198	Jeff Foxworthy was a regular on Shark Tank years ago.