Yesterday was my birthday. - GoFuckYourself.com

onwebcam · 08-21-2016, 09:51 AM

My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids.
I went to work and my colleagues didn't even wish me a happy birthday.
As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special.
She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment.
We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up..
I came out 5 minutes later and there she is holding a birthday cake.
Next to her is my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!"
And here I am standing there in my birthday suit..

The Porn Nerd · 08-21-2016, 10:01 AM

So...did you fuck your secretary or not?

Relic · 08-21-2016, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onwebcam

My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids.
I went to work and my colleagues didn't even wish me a happy birthday.
As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special.
She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment.
We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up..
I came out 5 minutes later and there she is holding a birthday cake.
Next to her is my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!"
And here I am standing there in my birthday suit..

Complicated but cool story bro

Struggle4Bucks · 08-21-2016, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by onwebcam

My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids.
I went to work and my colleagues didn't even wish me a happy birthday.
As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special.
She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment.
We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up..
I came out 5 minutes later and there she is holding a birthday cake.
Next to her is my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!"
And here I am standing there in my birthday suit..

You freshed up your penis... right? and then... well... what happend next was also nice

Unexpected... but... nice... right?

TheDynasty · 08-21-2016, 12:58 PM

Crazy Weekend!

romeo22 · 08-21-2016, 03:47 PM

Happy late bday. Glad they made your bday special

Mediamix · 08-21-2016, 04:57 PM

This joke is so fucking old..

SilentKnight · 08-21-2016, 05:05 PM

3...2...1 before gspotprod comes in asking for an explanation to the joke.

mineistaken · 08-21-2016, 05:11 PM

I thought it was wehateporn who told jokes in such a manner

jscott · 08-21-2016, 09:29 PM

hbd man, that'd be super awesome

Spunky · 08-21-2016, 09:42 PM

So you wound up pulling your own Pud?

plaster · 08-21-2016, 10:08 PM

Happy bday Mr webcam one! It's also paul Markham's bday today/yesterday if you didn't know already.

scarlettcontent · 08-22-2016, 12:55 AM

NatalieK · 08-22-2016, 02:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mediamix

This joke is so fucking old..

old but hilarious, had me giggling

I was reading through & thinking, ahhh poor bastard, I'll wish him a fantastic belated birthday, then goes to the naughty bit & it's like, oh, he got his end away before reading the line before last & then the last line, well, pml. Thanks onwebcam, just be sure, not to let this happen in reality

NatalieK · 08-22-2016, 02:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilentKnight

3...2...1 before gspotprod comes in asking for an explanation to the joke.

you must dream about me...

before reading this joke & while, even after, I didn't think about you once. Until I read your comment, wow, thanks for your interested in me... obsessed?

I feel sorry for you SK

ContentPimp · 08-22-2016, 04:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GspotProductions

old but hilarious, had me giggling

I was reading through & thinking, ahhh poor bastard, I'll wish him a fantastic belated birthday, then goes to the naughty bit & it's like, oh, he got his end away before reading the line before last & then the last line, well, pml. Thanks onwebcam, just be sure, not to let this happen in reality

If it would happen in reality it would go like...

We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up
In the restroom, I started talking to my dick,
"this better be a fucking good birthday"

NatalieK · 08-22-2016, 04:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ContentPimp

in reality it would go like...

We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up
In the restroom, I started talking to my dick,
"this better be a fucking good birthday"

& knowing most men, would knock one out there & then

08-21-2016, 09:51 AM	#1
onwebcam Fake Nick 1.0 Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Rent free, your head Posts: 26,802	Yesterday was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and my colleagues didn't even wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and I asked if I could use the restroom to freshen up.. I came out 5 minutes later and there she is holding a birthday cake. Next to her is my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" And here I am standing there in my birthday suit..

08-21-2016, 10:01 AM	#2
The Porn Nerd Living The Dream Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Inside a Monitor Posts: 19,248	So...did you fuck your secretary or not? __________________ My Affiliate Programs: Porn Nerd Cash \| Porn Showcase \| Aggressive Gold (Coming Soon) Over 90 paysites to promote! ICQ: 579915163 Skype: peabodymedia

08-21-2016, 12:58 PM	#5
TheDynasty See Signature Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2016 Location: noneya Posts: 5,882	Crazy Weekend! __________________ Try out WP-SCRIPT The Best Tube Script

08-21-2016, 04:57 PM	#7
Mediamix Dutch Webmaster! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Netherlands Posts: 3,227	This joke is so fucking old.. __________________ Sig too big

08-21-2016, 09:29 PM	#10
jscott jscizzle Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Taipei Posts: 23,581	hbd man, that'd be super awesome __________________ “If you think tough men are dangerous, wait until you see what weak men are capable of.” —Jordan B. Peterson Listen to Pomp tell why is Bitcoin important

08-21-2016, 03:47 PM	#6
romeo22 你自己去他媽的 Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 23,343	Happy late bday. Glad they made your bday special

08-21-2016, 05:05 PM	#8
SilentKnight Megan Fox's fluffer Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: shooting pool in Elysium Posts: 24,818	3...2...1 before gspotprod comes in asking for an explanation to the joke.

08-21-2016, 05:11 PM	#9
mineistaken See signature :) Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: ICQ 363 097 773 Posts: 29,656	I thought it was wehateporn who told jokes in such a manner

08-21-2016, 09:42 PM	#11
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,892	So you wound up pulling your own Pud? __________________ *Skype : Spunky GFY*

08-21-2016, 10:08 PM	#12
plaster So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2015 Posts: 2,295	Happy bday Mr webcam one! It's also paul Markham's bday today/yesterday if you didn't know already.

08-22-2016, 12:55 AM	#13
scarlettcontent www.scarlettcontent.net Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Pleiades Posts: 6,031	__________________ Scarlett Content - Adult Content Provider - High Quality Adult Stock Content for your Websites, Mobile Media and Print. Over 3 Million Images (14,000 photo sets) over 5000 Videos - Many Niches, US-2257, Awesome Prices. Over 40 years in the adult industry. [email protected] Follow us on twitter.