If I were to go on a date would any of you offer to come along and... - GoFuckYourself.com

CurrentlySober · 07-13-2018, 07:17 AM

Tell me things to say via a hidden earpiece that I'm wearing?

See, I'm a bit out of practise with the dating game and feel like its time to get back on the horse, so I feel this could be the ideal way for me to do it...

You see it all the time in movies and TV shows, (So its obviously a real thing) and from what I can tell, even if it ISN'T a successful date, it will no doubt end up with hilarious unintended consequences, and a great time will be had by all...

Any volunteers?

kmanrox · 07-13-2018, 07:42 AM

do you have a notebook you write all this stuff down in for future GFY use? heh

nosaint · 07-13-2018, 09:27 AM

Come on bro, you don’t need that. If she agreed on going on a date, 70% of the work is done already. Just listen to her, theow in some jokes, 2-3 compliments not more and you’re done.

Is not like a job interview. She wants to have some good time as well. Treat her like you treat a dear friend, without the dirty jokes

Sly · 07-13-2018, 09:40 AM

A new meaning to poolovers.com

MFCT · 07-13-2018, 10:07 AM

Just make your date (her?) laugh. You're a master at humor, and shouldn't need any help in the department.

For example, tell her to hurry up so you the two of you can arrive at the restaurant sooner rather than later, because you can't wait to get fatter. And if you happen to die from a heart attack during dinner, for her to just nonchalantly walk away from your corpse so she won't have to deal with the situation or answer questions. The fact that your corpse will still be chewing food will make it not immediately obvious that you've died at the dinner table, which will buy her some get-away time.

Tell her about how you're so fat that you'll need to be buried in a fat grave. And how there's no way to move that amount of dirt in enough time, to form a fat-enough grave hole, before your fat corpse turns into a no-fat-having skeleton.

Watch her try not to laugh out of fear of being rude. All the while, you're laughing at your own jokes. Which doesn't help her control herself. She tells you to stop laughing, which only makes you laugh more. Finally, she loses that inner-war with herself when she can no longer help but to laugh with you.

Then she becomes angry at you for putting her in that dilemma. You laugh at her for being angry over something so silly, which again put her in that try-not-to-laugh-out-of-fear-of-being-rude dilemma.

As for me, even if I didn't get laid, at least I'd know I had a good laugh out of the date. I wouldn't want to waste further time on someone who obviously has no sense of humor.

Good luck, and may the poo be with you.

CaptainHowdy · 07-13-2018, 10:35 AM

Breaking wind always makes a good icebreaker . . .

redwhiteandblue · 07-13-2018, 11:03 AM

I would do it but I'd be tempted to just play death metal music down the earpiece...

Spunky · 07-13-2018, 12:18 PM

Just whip out the balboski and say ride the pony bitch. Chicks dig that sort of thing

Holly Lez! · 07-13-2018, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CurrentlySober

Tell me things to say via a hidden earpiece that I'm wearing?

See, I'm a bit out of practise with the dating game and feel like its time to get back on the horse, so I feel this could be the ideal way for me to do it...

You see it all the time in movies and TV shows, (So its obviously a real thing) and from what I can tell, even if it ISN'T a successful date, it will no doubt end up with hilarious unintended consequences, and a great time will be had by all...

Any volunteers?

Yep I will do it

Bladewire · 07-13-2018, 05:02 PM

I'm here for you CS! I am offering to cum along

CaptainHowdy · 07-13-2018, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bladewire

I'm here for you CS! I am offering to cum along

kane · 07-13-2018, 05:16 PM

Go bold early. About five minutes into the date just drop your pants and drop a deuce. If she bolts, it wasn't meant to be. If she stays, you're in.

HairyChick · 07-13-2018, 05:56 PM

I agree with MFCT. It breaks the ice and she’ll see you have a sense of humor about your weight. Make sure to tell her that underneath is a very warm, caring, sexy man dying to emerge, but for now, the sexy side is hiding.

Try to relax, be yourself, keep the feces fetish talk out of the date, let her see the funny and caring guy you are. If it doesn’t work out, don’t give up. Be confident as you know you have a lot to offer.

If weight is an issue, don’t scream and yell. Just realize she’s not your type and there are more fish in the sea. You have the right bait, too.

07-13-2018, 07:17 AM	#1
CurrentlySober Too lazy to wipe my ass Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: A Public Bathroom Posts: 38,196	If I were to go on a date would any of you offer to come along and... Tell me things to say via a hidden earpiece that I'm wearing? See, I'm a bit out of practise with the dating game and feel like its time to get back on the horse, so I feel this could be the ideal way for me to do it... You see it all the time in movies and TV shows, (So its obviously a real thing) and from what I can tell, even if it ISN'T a successful date, it will no doubt end up with hilarious unintended consequences, and a great time will be had by all... Any volunteers? __________________ My AI Handywork... My Dream Gal... XXX 👁️ 👍️ 💩

07-13-2018, 07:42 AM	#2
kmanrox aka K-Man Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: The Gutter Posts: 29,276	do you have a notebook you write all this stuff down in for future GFY use? heh __________________ Crypto HODLr Crypto mining Angel investor

07-13-2018, 09:27 AM	#3
nosaint Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2017 Posts: 29	Come on bro, you don’t need that. If she agreed on going on a date, 70% of the work is done already. Just listen to her, theow in some jokes, 2-3 compliments not more and you’re done. Is not like a job interview. She wants to have some good time as well. Treat her like you treat a dear friend, without the dirty jokes __________________ Buying /Selling Adult Traffic Skype: [email protected]

07-13-2018, 09:40 AM	#4
Sly Let's do some business! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 31,244	A new meaning to poolovers.com __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Fully Managed VPS, Daily Backups Included - Starting at $25. Contact for more info. Sell me your: Paysites and Hosting Company. Buy my: Aged Domains and Sites

07-13-2018, 10:07 AM	#5
MFCT Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2015 Posts: 1,489	Just make your date (her?) laugh. You're a master at humor, and shouldn't need any help in the department. For example, tell her to hurry up so you the two of you can arrive at the restaurant sooner rather than later, because you can't wait to get fatter. And if you happen to die from a heart attack during dinner, for her to just nonchalantly walk away from your corpse so she won't have to deal with the situation or answer questions. The fact that your corpse will still be chewing food will make it not immediately obvious that you've died at the dinner table, which will buy her some get-away time. Tell her about how you're so fat that you'll need to be buried in a fat grave. And how there's no way to move that amount of dirt in enough time, to form a fat-enough grave hole, before your fat corpse turns into a no-fat-having skeleton. Watch her try not to laugh out of fear of being rude. All the while, you're laughing at your own jokes. Which doesn't help her control herself. She tells you to stop laughing, which only makes you laugh more. Finally, she loses that inner-war with herself when she can no longer help but to laugh with you. Then she becomes angry at you for putting her in that dilemma. You laugh at her for being angry over something so silly, which again put her in that try-not-to-laugh-out-of-fear-of-being-rude dilemma. As for me, even if I didn't get laid, at least I'd know I had a good laugh out of the date. I wouldn't want to waste further time on someone who obviously has no sense of humor. Good luck, and may the poo be with you. __________________ Keeping you abreast of the teens that get undressed. Girls By Location - Couples By Location - Guys By Location - Trans By Location

07-13-2018, 10:35 AM	#6
CaptainHowdy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Happy in the dark. Posts: 92,199	Breaking wind always makes a good icebreaker . . . __________________ Enroll in the SWAG Affiliate Asian Live Cam Program and get 9 free quality link-backs! Get those links up ASAP! --> TJEEZERS.Cam. Setup in 48 Hours max.

07-13-2018, 11:03 AM	#7
redwhiteandblue Bollocks Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Bollocks Posts: 2,792	I would do it but I'd be tempted to just play death metal music down the earpiece... __________________ Interserver unmanaged AMD Ryzen servers from $73.00

07-13-2018, 12:18 PM	#8
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,906	Just whip out the balboski and say ride the pony bitch. Chicks dig that sort of thing __________________ *Skype : Spunky GFY*

07-13-2018, 05:02 PM	#10
Bladewire StraightBro Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Monarch Beach, CA USA Posts: 56,232	I'm here for you CS! I am offering to cum along __________________ Skype: CallTomNow

07-13-2018, 05:16 PM	#12
kane Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: portland, OR Posts: 20,684	Go bold early. About five minutes into the date just drop your pants and drop a deuce. If she bolts, it wasn't meant to be. If she stays, you're in.

07-13-2018, 05:56 PM	#13
HairyChick Slowly dying Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Padanaram Posts: 3,091	I agree with MFCT. It breaks the ice and she’ll see you have a sense of humor about your weight. Make sure to tell her that underneath is a very warm, caring, sexy man dying to emerge, but for now, the sexy side is hiding. Try to relax, be yourself, keep the feces fetish talk out of the date, let her see the funny and caring guy you are. If it doesn’t work out, don’t give up. Be confident as you know you have a lot to offer. If weight is an issue, don’t scream and yell. Just realize she’s not your type and there are more fish in the sea. You have the right bait, too. __________________ ***************************************** Anti-Semites have Small Penis Syndrome. The only known treatment is electroshock therapy combined with cerebellum removal. Fortunately, it’s a tiny procedure. *****************************************