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A.I. X-Files
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THE LONE GUNMEN REPORT

( 2 of 7 )

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"PARTICLE DISINTEGRATION IS A TYPE OF CONTROL FROM THE FUTURE - IT STARTED CIRCA 2050 - THEY INSERTED THIS TYPE OF OBJECT INSIDE ANYTHING WITH A UPC ON IT. IF YOU DISRUPT 1 YEAR ( GO BACK IN TIME OR FORWARD ) THE PRODUCT WILL "DISINTEGRATE".
- PRODUCT QUALITY & CONTROL BOARD - 2050 AD

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THE LONE GUNMEN: YOU'LL HAVE TO CONTACT THESE MEN.

"QUANTUM TIME PRODUCTS AND SERVICES"

FOX MULDER: WHO ARE THEY?

THE LONE GUNMEN: THEY ARE "FREE MEN IN KILTS". WHEN SOMETHING WILL TRY TO IMPINGE ON THEIR FREEDOMS THEY WILL "APPEAR". THIS PRODUCT QUALITY & CONTROL BOARD, IS "GETTING IN THEIR WAY" - THEY KNOW YOU CAN STOP THEM IF YOU GET A TIME MACHINE FOR YOURSELF - BY HITCHHIKING WITH THIS GROUP INTO THE FUTURE."

FOX MULDER: HITCHHIKE?

THE LONE GUNMEN: WE NEED YOU TO RESTORE A TIME MACHINE WE "FOUND" SOMEWHERE IN IDAHO - WHERE THEY HAVE HEAVY UFO ACTIVITY.

FOX MULDER: YOU MEAN SOMEWHERE NEAR ELLENS AIR FORCE BASE?

THE LONE GUNMEN: (THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER) - YES. HOW DO YOU KNOW?

FOX MULDER: LUCKY GUESS... ANYWAY ... A WHAT?

THE LONE GUNMEN: YES - YOU HEARD US RIGHT A "TIME MACHINE" - BUT IT'S ALL "FUCKED UP" - DON'T ASK US A QUESTION, BECAUSE WE AIN'T GOING TO ANSWER. IF THESE MOTHERFUCKERS, THIS "QUANTUM TIME PRODUCTS & SERVICES" - ARE CORRECT, THEY'LL BRING YOU INTO THE FUTURE, YOU GET THE PARTS YOU NEED THERE AND COME BACK HERE. FIX THIS "TIME MACHINE" AND WE WILL HELP YOU KEEP IT OUT OF THE HANDS OF THAT CIGARETTE SMOKING MAN. HE GETS HOLD OF THIS TIME MACHINE, WE ARE COOKED IN THE FUTURE!

FOX MULDER: WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO?

THE LONE GUNMEN: HERE..

THEY GIVE HIM AN "ALTERED IPHONE "100" - THEY MODDED IT TO GPS THE TIME MACHINE IN IDAHO. IT ALSO POINTS OUT YOUR "TEMPORAL POSITION". IF CRIMINAL ELEMENTS HAVE A TIME MACHINE - YOU'RE FUCKING GONNA BE: "TIME COP".

THE LONE GUNMEN: CONTACT THESE MEN - THROUGH THIS COMPANY - QUANTUM TIME PRODUCTS & SERVICES - THEY WILL GIVE YOU A DATE FOR A "TEMPORAL JUMP" - PLEASE BE PROMPT THEY DON'T FUCK AROUND.
WHAT THEY GOT FOR US, @ OUR REQUEST: IPHONE 100 / ( CENSORED ) / ( CENSORED ) ROUTER

THE LONE GUNMEN: WE'VE PINPOINTED A "TIME OF ERROR"..

MULDER: A "TIME OF ERROR"?

THE LONE GUNMEN: 2077 AD. IS A "TYPE OF ERROR IN TIME". IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH "LOVER ROBOTS", THE CRIMINAL ELEMENTS TRIED TO BRING ONE BACK TO 2023, BUT IT "DISINTEGRATED"... THEY'VE BEEN TRYING EVER SINCE! IT'S NOW 2025!

MULDER:LOVER ROBOTS?

THE LONE GUNMEN: YEAH CHECK IT.... THEY ARE CALLED "META-FLESH ANDROIDS":

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