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Old 01-03-2006, 12:47 PM   #1
adder
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:mad Gay joke for you. Don't tell it to policemen

A gay approaches a policeman:
-Dear Mr policeman, how do I get to the buss station?
-Go straight.
-Ummh... well, I'd better take a train.
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Old 01-03-2006, 12:50 PM   #2
sickkittens
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I'm sorry. Was that supposed to be funny?
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Old 01-03-2006, 12:51 PM   #3
woj
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I don't get it either...
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Old 01-03-2006, 12:56 PM   #4
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these 3 guys got killed and sent to heaven, and god was there to meet them, he told them if they gave up their biggest sin , he would give them all a second chance , but as soon as they sinned they would go "poof" to hell.

The first guy was a drinker so he had to give up booze

The second guy was gay so he had to give up bum sex

The third guy was a banker and had to give up money..

So god puts them all back on earth , and they are all walking down the street together..

The drunk see's a sign that says BEER FOR 5 CENTS , and he cant resist so he goes and chugs a glass. POOF he vanishes..

The other 2 guys see this and are like " we wont fall for that "

so they are walking down the street and the banker see's a quarter on the ground and bends over to pick it up..

POOF they both vanish..
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Old 01-03-2006, 12:56 PM   #5
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Holy hell, they call that a joke.
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Old 01-03-2006, 12:58 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by woj
I don't get it either...
You'll get it when this thread has 50 posts in it
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:00 PM   #7
BoyAlley
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Yeah, that was pretty stupid.

Here's a fag joke that's actually funny:

Quote:
In a small cathedral a janitor was cleaning the pews between services when he was approached by the minister. The minister asked the janitor, "Could you go into the confessional and listen to confessions for me? I really have to go to the bathroom and the Widow McGee is coming. She tends to go on but never really does anything worthy of serious repentance, so when she's done just give her 10 Hail Mary's and I'll be right back."

Being the helpful sort, the janitor agreed. Just as expected the Widow McGee came into the booth and started her confession. "Oh Father, I fear I have done the unforgivable. I have given into carnal thoughts and have had oral sex."

Stunned, the janitor had no idea how to handle this situation. Surely 10 Hail Mary's would not do. So, in a moment of desperation the janitor peered his head out of the confessional and asked an altar boy, "Son, what does the minister give for oral sex?"

In reply the altar boy said, "Two Snickers bars and a Coke."
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:02 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoyAlley
Yeah, that was pretty stupid.

Here's a fag joke that's actually funny:
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:06 PM   #9
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These 3 homeless guys are stealing fruit from an orchard , and the farmer catches them. He tells them if they pick a basket of fruit each for him he will let them have some and let them go..

So the first guy picks a basket of lemon's and takes them to the farmhouse , the farmer comes outside with a shotgun and says.

STICK THOSE FRUIT UP YOUR ASS WITHOUT LAUGHING OR CRYING OR I BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF !!

So the guy starts shoving the lemons up his ass, but it hurts so much he starts crying , and BOOM the farmer kills him..

Now the second guy comes up to the farmhouse with a basket of cherries, the farmer comes outside with a shotgun and says.

STICK THOSE FRUIT UP YOUR ASS WITHOUT LAUGHING OR CRYING OR I BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF !!

The guy starts shoving cherries up his ass but he breaks out giggling and BOOM the farmer blows his head off..

So the two guys are up in heaven and the second guy says to the first guy " it must have hurt shoving those lemons up your ass ? " and the first guy says " yup it did, but what i cant understand is why you were laughing , it cant be that fun shoving cherries up your ass even if they are small ?" the second guy says " i saw the third guy coming over the hill with watermelons "
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:10 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoyAlley
Yeah, that was pretty stupid.

Here's a fag joke that's actually funny:
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:26 PM   #11
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He was so gay that he sold his car only because it was equiped with a Straight Six engine...
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:30 PM   #12
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This is a true story. A guy asked my cousin if he wanted to go to a well-known gay bar after work. Thinking quickly, my cousin said "No thanks. I don't drink."
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:37 PM   #13
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Okay, gays, who would come to a gay-bar with me?
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:41 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear
These 3 homeless guys are stealing fruit from an orchard , and the farmer catches them. He tells them if they pick a basket of fruit each for him he will let them have some and let them go..

So the first guy picks a basket of lemon's and takes them to the farmhouse , the farmer comes outside with a shotgun and says.

STICK THOSE FRUIT UP YOUR ASS WITHOUT LAUGHING OR CRYING OR I BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF !!

So the guy starts shoving the lemons up his ass, but it hurts so much he starts crying , and BOOM the farmer kills him..

Now the second guy comes up to the farmhouse with a basket of cherries, the farmer comes outside with a shotgun and says.

STICK THOSE FRUIT UP YOUR ASS WITHOUT LAUGHING OR CRYING OR I BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF !!

The guy starts shoving cherries up his ass but he breaks out giggling and BOOM the farmer blows his head off..

So the two guys are up in heaven and the second guy says to the first guy " it must have hurt shoving those lemons up your ass ? " and the first guy says " yup it did, but what i cant understand is why you were laughing , it cant be that fun shoving cherries up your ass even if they are small ?" the second guy says " i saw the third guy coming over the hill with watermelons "

i like this one best
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:41 PM   #15
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Man those are some lame ass jokes.

<--- Note to self. Dont steal fruit.
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:41 PM   #16
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funny!

funny!
well at least for me! call me a simpleton
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:45 PM   #17
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Thanx
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:51 PM   #18
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ok

not funny
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Old 01-03-2006, 01:54 PM   #19
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Got some decent jokes here. Nice way to brighten the day :-)

Any others jokes?

Matt
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Old 01-03-2006, 02:00 PM   #20
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yeah, does anyone have more jokes?
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Old 01-03-2006, 02:08 PM   #21
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:tongue Sure

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, please forgive me

Once Mr. Watson went to a whore. They spent a night and in the morning she asked him:
-You are a naughty man Mr. Watson. What would Mrs. Hudson say if she knew where you have been?
-How do you know Mrs. Hudson?
-Elementary, My Dear Watson- said the whore roughly and took off the wig.
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Old 01-03-2006, 06:09 PM   #22
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I find the first joke lame.
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Old 01-03-2006, 06:13 PM   #23
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It's not the funniest gay joke but if one doesn't get it right away--tell something about their IQ!
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Old 01-03-2006, 06:39 PM   #24
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what do you call two gay guys named "Bob"?

























Oral Roberts
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Old 01-03-2006, 09:58 PM   #25
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:1orglugh Worth a laugh adder..
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Old 01-03-2006, 10:01 PM   #26
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Old 01-03-2006, 10:04 PM   #27
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Not a gay joke, but funny.

Two very old, very ugly men were sitting in a bar one afternoon, getting drunk.

A group of hot college girls walks into the bar, and sits down across the room from the ugly fuckers.

One ugly guy says to his pal: "You know, I could fuck any one of those babes... tonight!"

His friend replies: "Oh yea? Look at you, you're an old fucker, uglier than me even, and you haven't a tooth in your stinking mouth. What makes you think that you could even come close to banging one of those sweet young things?"

"I'm a rapist!"
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Old 01-03-2006, 10:22 PM   #28
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You can't please everybody but I personally found that funny man!
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Old 01-03-2006, 10:38 PM   #29
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I heard most of these jokes when I was 8-9 years old...
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