sex tips from 1894!! - GoFuckYourself.com

Grapesoda · 11-15-2008, 08:22 AM

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/s...r-1894-307609/

Imagine a time when sex was seen as "at best revolting and at worst rather painful." According to The Sun (and well, anyone who's ever taken rudimentary history lessons), the Victorians, not exactly known for their raunchy bedroom antics, perceived a woman's um, "wifely duties" as something to abhor. Sex Tips for Husbands and Wives was penned by Ruth Smythers, a vicar's wife, in 1894. Some amazing gems:

* The wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual experiences weekly ? and as time goes by she should make every effort to reduce this frequency.

* A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of his wife. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: Give little, give seldom and above all give grudgingly. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.

* A wise wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her.

* Once in bed, the wife should turn off all the lights and make no sound to guide her husband in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement.

* When he finds her, she should lie as still as possible. Bodily motion could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic husband. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practised only in total darkness.

* Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. Arguments, nagging, scolding and bickering prove very effective if used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction.

* By their tenth anniversary many wives have managed to complete their child-bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of terminating all sexual contacts with the husband.

Lycanthrope · 11-15-2008, 08:24 AM

I've been married 13 years.

Sounds like life in 2008.

Marcus Aurelius · 11-15-2008, 08:24 AM

you mean... wives aren't supposed to act this way now?! FUCK!!

Grapesoda · 11-15-2008, 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MDCQ

you mean... wives aren't supposed to act this way now?! FUCK!!

so you married an old fashioned girl, uh?

martinsc · 11-15-2008, 08:44 AM

lol, sounds familiar

Porko · 11-15-2008, 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

I've been married 13 years.
Sounds like life in 2008.

ouch

that sucks man..

Rochard · 11-15-2008, 08:58 AM

Man, life must of sucked back then!

Bojangles · 11-15-2008, 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rochard

Man, life must of sucked back then!

No doubt

Klen · 11-15-2008, 09:49 AM

Sex in darkness only lol.Like is forbidden to see penis or vagina.

Slick · 11-15-2008, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

I've been married 13 years.

Sounds like life in 2008.

ROFL, ha ha ha

camperjohn64 · 11-15-2008, 10:08 AM

I dont think they needed rules for this, they just needed marriage. The last 3 sound like pretty much 80% of the marriages out there!

mrwilson · 11-15-2008, 10:20 AM

fuck that lol.

Great read though, thanks for posting

JenniDahling · 11-15-2008, 11:00 AM

When I married my first husband my older Filipino aunt told me to remember 3 things to keep a marriage happy:

1) Wake up 30 min before him and go to sleep after him so he never sees you without makeup. (I was like "F that, he's going to see me in childbirth so who cares about makeup")

2) Always wake up to make him breakfast and no matter what time he comes in, offer to cook him something. (I was like "F that, he knows how to pour cereal and use a microwave")

3) Never ever refuse him sex. Even if you don't want it there are other ways to please him. (at that point I threw up a little in my mouth with the mental picture I got of her and my overweight uncle getting it on)

Needless to say I'm happily divorced.

Violetta · 11-15-2008, 11:03 AM

fucking no.. that is just wrong! lol

FlexxAeon · 11-15-2008, 11:08 AM

typo in the title. that 8 should be a 9

woj · 11-15-2008, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lycanthrope

I've been married 13 years.

Sounds like life in 2008.

camperjohn64 · 11-15-2008, 11:29 AM

You know what's fucked up. One religious asshole who had problems with sex, wrote this and fucked it up for everyone else.

Imagine if the person that wrote these "instructions" was liberated, writing things like "have sex as often as possible, and explore as many ways to enjoy sex", how much more fun life would have been for the millions upon millions of people that have been born lived and died since this was written.

BlackCrayon · 11-15-2008, 01:49 PM

Well, things were a bit different then. Since condoms and birth control weren't around the possiblity of having child after child was a lot higher then than it is today. Still, its sad that sex has always been looked at in this way until recently in our history. I've even heard bran was first invented as way to keep husbands shitting all day so they have no interest in sex, lol.

Elli · 11-15-2008, 01:54 PM

That explains my mother soooo much!

collegeboobies · 11-15-2008, 01:56 PM

What a bitch

2012 · 11-15-2008, 01:57 PM

* A wise wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her. ?

times have really changed ...

Z · 11-15-2008, 04:20 PM

I'll be writing about this on www.sexualempowerment.com soon.

It's amazing what people let their insecurities and fears cause them to do.

jmcb420 · 11-15-2008, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bm bradley

[url] * Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. Arguments, nagging, scolding and bickering prove very effective if used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction.

Vick! · 11-15-2008, 04:51 PM

I wonder if people were actually following those tips..

11-15-2008, 08:22 AM	#1
Grapesoda So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Montana Posts: 46,238	sex tips from 1894!! http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/s...r-1894-307609/ Imagine a time when sex was seen as "at best revolting and at worst rather painful." According to The Sun (and well, anyone who's ever taken rudimentary history lessons), the Victorians, not exactly known for their raunchy bedroom antics, perceived a woman's um, "wifely duties" as something to abhor. Sex Tips for Husbands and Wives was penned by Ruth Smythers, a vicar's wife, in 1894. Some amazing gems: * The wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual experiences weekly ? and as time goes by she should make every effort to reduce this frequency. * A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of his wife. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: Give little, give seldom and above all give grudgingly. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust. * A wise wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her. * Once in bed, the wife should turn off all the lights and make no sound to guide her husband in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement. * When he finds her, she should lie as still as possible. Bodily motion could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic husband. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practised only in total darkness. * Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. Arguments, nagging, scolding and bickering prove very effective if used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction. * By their tenth anniversary many wives have managed to complete their child-bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of terminating all sexual contacts with the husband.

11-15-2008, 08:24 AM	#2
Lycanthrope Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 4,517	I've been married 13 years. Sounds like life in 2008. __________________

11-15-2008, 08:44 AM	#5
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	lol, sounds familiar __________________ Make Money

11-15-2008, 08:58 AM	#7
Rochard Jägermeister Test Pilot Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: NORCAL Posts: 73,408	Man, life must of sucked back then! __________________ “The choice is no longer between right or left. The choice is between normal and crazy.” - Sarah Huckabee Sanders YNOT MAIL \| THE BEST ADULT MAILING SOLUTION

11-15-2008, 10:08 AM	#11
camperjohn64 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 1,531	I dont think they needed rules for this, they just needed marriage. The last 3 sound like pretty much 80% of the marriages out there! __________________ www.gimmiegirlproductions.com

11-15-2008, 08:24 AM	#3
Marcus Aurelius No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 14,809	you mean... wives aren't supposed to act this way now?! FUCK!!

11-15-2008, 09:49 AM	#9
Klen Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Little Vienna Posts: 32,235	Sex in darkness only lol.Like is forbidden to see penis or vagina.

11-15-2008, 10:20 AM	#12
mrwilson mrwilson 2.0 Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: ICQ: 465406783 Posts: 5,122	fuck that lol. Great read though, thanks for posting

11-15-2008, 11:00 AM	#13
JenniDahling Market Penetration Specialist Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Out of my Suitcases Posts: 5,285	When I married my first husband my older Filipino aunt told me to remember 3 things to keep a marriage happy: 1) Wake up 30 min before him and go to sleep after him so he never sees you without makeup. (I was like "F that, he's going to see me in childbirth so who cares about makeup") 2) Always wake up to make him breakfast and no matter what time he comes in, offer to cook him something. (I was like "F that, he knows how to pour cereal and use a microwave") 3) Never ever refuse him sex. Even if you don't want it there are other ways to please him. (at that point I threw up a little in my mouth with the mental picture I got of her and my overweight uncle getting it on) Needless to say I'm happily divorced. __________________ cLick my kitty, you know you want to jenni {at} prkitty.com Meet me at The Island Gathering

11-15-2008, 11:03 AM	#14
Violetta Affiliate Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 28,735	fucking no.. that is just wrong! lol __________________ M&A Queen

11-15-2008, 11:08 AM	#15
FlexxAeon Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 3,765	typo in the title. that 8 should be a 9 __________________ flexx [dot] aeon [at] gmail

11-15-2008, 11:29 AM	#17
camperjohn64 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 1,531	You know what's fucked up. One religious asshole who had problems with sex, wrote this and fucked it up for everyone else. Imagine if the person that wrote these "instructions" was liberated, writing things like "have sex as often as possible, and explore as many ways to enjoy sex", how much more fun life would have been for the millions upon millions of people that have been born lived and died since this was written. __________________ www.gimmiegirlproductions.com

11-15-2008, 01:49 PM	#18
BlackCrayon Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 19,631	Well, things were a bit different then. Since condoms and birth control weren't around the possiblity of having child after child was a lot higher then than it is today. Still, its sad that sex has always been looked at in this way until recently in our history. I've even heard bran was first invented as way to keep husbands shitting all day so they have no interest in sex, lol. __________________ you don't know you're wearing a leash if you sit by the peg all day..

11-15-2008, 01:54 PM	#19
Elli Reach for those stars! Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Vancouver, BC Posts: 17,991	That explains my mother soooo much! __________________ Make More Money with Cams and Dating at FFN.com! email: [email protected]

11-15-2008, 01:56 PM	#20
collegeboobies So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 3,644	What a bitch

11-15-2008, 01:57 PM	#21
2012 So Fucking What Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 17,189	* A wise wife will make it her goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him to display his unclothed body to her. ? times have really changed ... __________________ best host: Webair \| best sponsor: Kink \| best coder: 688218966 \| Go Fuck Yourself

11-15-2008, 04:20 PM	#22
Z Vidi Vici Veni Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 6,308	I'll be writing about this on www.sexualempowerment.com soon. It's amazing what people let their insecurities and fears cause them to do.

11-15-2008, 04:51 PM	#24
Vick! Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: 20 00'24.00" N, 75 09'00.00 W Posts: 6,882	I wonder if people were actually following those tips.. __________________ Affordable Quality Web Hosting