Arranged marriage versus personal ads.

[sortie]

I hear people say that arranged marriage is horrible, primitive, oppressive etc...

They say that the people are not in love etc...

More and more I see personal ads/dating sites to be nothing more than the same
as arranged marriage.

Both concepts require a "pre-screening" of "qualifications such as :

Desire to meet X with the following

* race
* hair
* eyes
* location
* faith
* income/profession/life goals
* etc...

With arrange marriage I guess the families decides those factors where as in personal
ads the ad placer decides that alone.

And I guess that fact would be what makes personal ads better --
Independence and control.

Interesting to me is that in arranged marriage the families describe the respective
mate but in dating sites both mates describe themselves.

When considering that, which method produces a more accurate description and
therefore more likely to produce a realistic match?

Is the family more likely to tell the absolute truth about you and therefore more
capable of finding someone who can tolerate all your stupid shit?





I don't want anyone telling me who to date/marry.
But I find the process we use not to be that far off since most people avoid
personal ads and get a friend to "fix me up with someone".

Does your friend know you better than your momma?

Let's stay away from "arranged" marriage, but if your mom tells you that you
should marry person X, then maybe you should consider it; given the way
most people's shit turns out.

[Badmaash]

Originally Posted by sortie

I hear people say that arranged marriage is horrible, primitive, oppressive etc...

They say that the people are not in love etc...

More and more I see personal ads/dating sites to be nothing more than the same
as arranged marriage.

Both concepts require a "pre-screening" of "qualifications such as :

Desire to meet X with the following

* race
* hair
* eyes
* location
* faith
* income/profession/life goals
* etc...

With arrange marriage I guess the families decides those factors where as in personal
ads the ad placer decides that alone.

And I guess that fact would be what makes personal ads better --
Independence and control.

Interesting to me is that in arranged marriage the families describe the respective
mate but in dating sites both mates describe themselves.

When considering that, which method produces a more accurate description and
therefore more likely to produce a realistic match?

Is the family more likely to tell the absolute truth about you and therefore more
capable of finding someone who can tolerate all your stupid shit?





I don't want anyone telling me who to date/marry.
But I find the process we use not to be that far off since most people avoid
personal ads and get a friend to "fix me up with someone".

Does your friend know you better than your momma?

Let's stay away from "arranged" marriage, but if your mom tells you that you
should marry person X, then maybe you should consider it; given the way
most people's shit turns out.

Arranged marriages are when the parents of a boy and girl look for a suitable partner based on fiting looks, job, salaary, and family background. If the children think its a good match then then meet up on a few dates to get to know each other not to have a quick fuck but purely in the interest of marriage. If they think its good and the parents are happy then they get married otherwise they look for a better match.

Marriage is like a business so arrange marriages will get the couple together to make it work, rather than fall in love first and then try to make it work and the get divorced.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arranged_marriage

[thickcash_amo]

I wouldn't want to be forced to marry someone! I'll take the dating scene (as crappy as it is) until I find the right "someone".

[Badmaash]

Originally Posted by thickcash_amo

I wouldn't want to be forced to marry someone! I'll take the dating scene (as crappy as it is) until I find the right "someone".

You dont get forced........

[sortie]

Originally Posted by Badmaash

Arranged marriages are when the parents of a boy and girl look for a suitable partner based on fiting looks, job, salaary, and family background. If the children think its a good match then then meet up on a few dates to get to know each other not to have a quick fuck but purely in the interest of marriage. If they think its good and the parents are happy then they get married otherwise they look for a better match.

Marriage is like a business so arrange marriages will get the couple together to make it work, rather than fall in love first and then try to make it work and the get divorced.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arranged_marriage

Yes, this is how I understood it to be. I left out the part about the couple actually
being able to reject the arrangement.

It makes little sense to go ahead with the marriage if one or both mates is opposed
to the union.

[sortie]

Originally Posted by thickcash_amo

I wouldn't want to be forced to marry someone! I'll take the dating scene (as crappy as it is) until I find the right "someone".

Me either. However, forcing is not the way most arranged marriages happen.

But of course many of us in America think that because we are always fed the
worst case stories about other cultures. Hate propaganda would actually be the
correct way to describe the way we are often educated about other cultures in America.

Nobody in America gave a shit about women's rights in the middle east until we
decided to kill them. At that point we then got our "education" of their culture.

[ottopottomouse]

Originally Posted by Badmaash

Marriage is like a business so arrange marriages will get the couple together to make it work, rather than fall in love first and then try to make it work and the get divorced.