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-   -   Man Confesses To Having Sex with 1,000+ Cars (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=1023388)

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 03:40 AM

Man Confesses To Having Sex with 1,000+ Cars
 
Not in...with! :Oh crap

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/...04_672768c.jpg

Quote:

Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways.

"I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to the point of what I feel is an expression of love," he said.

"Maybe I'm a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it's just wonderful.

"I'm a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change."

He added: "I'm not sick and I don't want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference."
Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men.

But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger.

Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses.

But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.

His last relationship with a woman was 12 years ago - and he could not bring himself to consummate it, although he did have sex with girls in his younger days.

Mr Smith, from Washington state in the US, kept quiet about his secret fetish for years, but agreed to be interviewed as part of a channel Five documentary into “mechaphilia”. He is shown meeting other enthusiasts at a rally in California

Talking about how his unusual passion developed, Mr Smith said: "It's something that grew as a part of me when I was a kid and I could not shake it.

"I just loved cute cars right from the beginning, but over the years it got stronger once I got into my teenage years and was my first having sexual urges.

"When I turned 13 and the famous Corvette Stingray came about, that car was pure sex and just an incredible machine. I wanted it.

"I didn't fully understand it myself except that I know I'm not hurting anyone and I do not intend to."

He added: "There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving.

"There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them.

"As far as women go, they never really interested me much. And I'm not gay.”

Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums.
Who knew? :helpme :1orglaugh :eek2

Any other car lovers out there? Do tell... :)

ADG

djroof 05-20-2011 03:41 AM

this world sucks!

Seth Manson 05-20-2011 03:42 AM

Didnt Headless have sex with a car?

alias 05-20-2011 03:43 AM

Love the Herbie shirt, it's so perfect.

ThatOtherGuy - BANNED FOR LIFE 05-20-2011 03:54 AM

New Niche?

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 03:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seth Manson (Post 18153714)

Didn't Headless have sex with a car?

I dunno...is this Headless?:

http://images.tzaam.com/full/11f.jpg

:helpme

ADG

ottopottomouse 05-20-2011 04:28 AM

How violated would you feel if he raped your car?

L-Pink 05-20-2011 04:30 AM

That is a sweet little ride.

u-Bob 05-20-2011 04:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude (Post 18153740)

I was waiting for someone to post that pic :)

Coup 05-20-2011 04:37 AM

Love Bug

amirite guys?

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 04:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by u-Bob (Post 18153796)
I was waiting for someone to post that pic :)

He's not alone... :helpme

http://newsliteimgs.s3.amazonaws.com/080917_carsex.jpg

Quote:

A drunk man was arrested after police caught him having sex with a car.

The violated vehicle was a Toyota 4X4 which had been parked on a quiet street in the US.

The intoxicated man appeared to find it irresistible and passers-by filmed the event on mobile phones as he dropped his trousers and attempted to have sex with the front of the car.

In the clip he seems to struggle to achieve his aim, though this is not known if this was a brewers droop problem or an issue with the grill.

Police were called as he had a one-on-one with the 4X4 and arrested him as he staggered away from his parking space conquest.

Spare a thought for the poor car owner who was undoubtedly told what had happened to his sexually abused vehicle upon his return.
:anon

ADG

CurrentlySober 05-20-2011 05:21 AM

i cant afford a car...

Jensen 05-20-2011 05:40 AM

what the heck?

Spunky 05-20-2011 05:50 AM

Cars can be such whores at times

Bama 05-20-2011 08:05 AM

C'mon - with that easy to remove top and a big set of headlights, you know that Volkswagon was just asking for it!

elmy 05-20-2011 08:26 AM

sad news for civilization

romeo22 05-20-2011 08:34 AM

1000 times Lmao..what a jerk :pimp

HookUPcom 05-20-2011 08:37 AM

Can't reproduce that way right?


.

SZNY 05-20-2011 08:39 AM

lol a new niche :D

PornGreen 05-20-2011 08:40 AM

i wonder if that would show up on those vehicle history reports

Scott McD 05-20-2011 08:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PornGreen (Post 18154154)
i wonder if that would show up on those vehicle history reports

2 previous owners

67k miles

Been raped


:1orglaugh

piers30 05-20-2011 08:47 AM

what is he expecting
 
Is he planning a robot baby or perhaps AN ANDROID for a kid ?

RyuLion 05-20-2011 08:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky (Post 18153886)
Cars can be such whores at times

:2 cents: :1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

barcodes 05-20-2011 08:55 AM

It's called objectum sexuality


What a whore


On a serious note:
I think this chick was an Olympic archer and her career went to shit because she fell in love with her bow "Lance" and couldnt shoot it anymore or something.

Chosen 05-20-2011 08:56 AM

LoL :1orglaugh

CaptainHowdy 05-20-2011 08:57 AM

A car can't say "no" ...

thickcash_amo 05-20-2011 09:46 AM

um how is that even comfortable?

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 11:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PornGreen (Post 18154154)
i wonder if that would show up on those vehicle history reports

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/zezima/CARFAX.png

Check out this slutty chick in a thong:

http://media.funmansion.com/content/...7/sexy_car.jpg

You know you want it:



:hitit :error

ADG

marlboroack 05-20-2011 11:22 AM

LOL, where do you think he blew the load?

cooldude7 05-20-2011 11:26 AM

he is sick.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by marlboroack (Post 18154528)

LOL, where do you think he blew the load?

I'm guessing in the trunk or the tailpipe - nothing a little WD40 won't unstick (reportedly, it makes great lube too):

http://www.sexypictures.dk/images/Vwgina.jpg

Quote:

Originally Posted by cooldude7 (Post 18154543)

he is sick.

...and he's not alone: :helpme

http://www.rawtop.com/blog/resources...is_sagat_2.jpg

Apparently some women are into this fetish as well:

http://174.127.67.28/t/68/99/23/1-320x240.jpg

ADG

Anonymous_Producer 05-20-2011 03:14 PM

1073 Opel GT
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude (Post 18153706)





I wonder if he did The Freakin' Nasty with my old 1973 Opel GT...lol

adultzone 05-20-2011 05:55 PM

That is bullshit.

AnimeFevers 05-20-2011 06:44 PM

OWWwwwww my little eyes.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by adultzone (Post 18155424)
That is bullshit.

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/...-2_672783n.jpg

http://sitelife.app.com/ver1.0/Conte...4d9b.Large.jpg

http://www.wunderkabinett.co.uk/gall...ar_sex_400.jpg

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_uVvOPyNpy1...er-power-1.jpg

http://mrbadak.com/wp-content/upload...-give-a-fk.jpg

ADG

papill0n 05-20-2011 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude (Post 18154623)
I'm guessing in the trunk or the tailpipe - nothing a little WD40 won't unstick (reportedly, it makes great lube too):

http://www.sexypictures.dk/images/Vwgina.jpg

ADG

that car does look pretty tasty :1orglaugh

rock-reed 05-20-2011 11:00 PM


AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-20-2011 11:31 PM

It's an epidemic... :helpme





ADG

fogfever 05-21-2011 06:02 AM

gives a whole new meaning to bang bus.

adultchatpay 05-21-2011 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude (Post 18153740)
I dunno...is this Headless?:

http://images.tzaam.com/full/11f.jpg

:helpme

ADG

MAn, with all the grease and carbon shits in there! He needs to give that a blowjob too.


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