Wedding ceremony...
 

Was/is this important to you? Would you blow 30k+ out on this if you were just a coder?

nope, its waste of money

Having had the big ceremony and reception, I can tell you first hand that it was an amazing party and I would have loved to enjoy it as a guest.

We had roughly 265 people and the cost was up there. When all was said and done I can say what a fucking waste! It was a whirlwind that went by in a flash, I didn't get to spend as much time with the ones that really mattered because there were too many people to get through.

I don't regret spending the money because we got back 65% in gifts and it was a crazy party, we didn't cheap out or hold back on anything but the guest list should have been cut in half at the very least.

Never again would I do it like that, hopefully I'll never have to. Sadly $30k isn't even much for a wedding these days, it's sickening what things cost.

Go small and intimate and take a hell of a honeymoon!

My personal thought is that $30k towards a home is a much better start to a marriage than a one day party.

Fuck that shit for sure.

Asking cus a buddy of mine just did that. I'd say it's Gross, even Gross Stupid. But, as it seems to be, he is marrying a girl from a rich family and don't wanna play cheap ass, so he took all his savings and put it on the table. No, wait, still fucking Stupid. Bu he says she loves him. What? Okay, that happens, but why feed a bunch of people you will NEVER see in your life again?

i'm under the same belief personally... but i have a big family... so makes it a tough choice.


I think having the festivities abroad would help though.. not everyone can make it out to something like that plus you don't have to travel for the honeymoon, just have it there :)




...fuck i must be getting old if i have shit like this on the brain!

General rule seems to be

The more you spend on the wedding the shorter the marriage lasts.

Anything you put into a marriage will eventually be a waste so ...

The problem with something like that is people often feel obligated to attend the wedding. They will not just say no. So you are putting anyone that you invite in a very tough position and instead of covering the costs yourself, you're making them eat it LOL. I get grumpy going 4 hours to a wedding, a nice getaway would drive me nuts!

he probably recovered most of it with gifts, etc, or if he got lucky could have even made $$ on the deal... so it all depends...

it was important to my wife and the ~400 guests....
for me it was just a busy and expensive day.....

Moments like this is what life is all about. Good Investment.

If it was a demand from my future wife or her family i would IMMEDIATELY leave the train.

Being just a coder working in the office and giving out life savings for one night is kinda .. too old school or better say NUTS. Next day comes and they live in a rented studio. Still good memories?

I would imagine that $30k would be the standard, and quickly.

I got married years ago, very small wedding, and it cost me $10k. I bet you a big wedding today costs a lot more.

It was the least important thing. I wonder when will Europe get rid of all that monarchic stupidity from aeons ago.

Fucking Yeah!

IMHO, you should not have more than 75 to 100 guests.... or you lose the ability to see/hang with everybody, and when you are booking venues/DJ/catering/etc... NEVER use the word "wedding". The moment that you do, the price of whatever you are booking shoots up. If you don't invite too many people, and you really think about the things that make a good party in your mind, then you can have a blast, and it's worth it.... You might as well enjoy life, never know what's going to happen.



.

If they have big money why is he paying?

Renting a hall, feeding 100+ people, premium booze, dj or band, it's gonna cost $200 to $300 a head regardless.

nah.. no demand... lol

but it was my demand to make my wife happy :)

well depends on what you can and want to spend, my wife and i had a 10k agreement.
We went to Hawaii, had 26 people at our wedding and had a BLAST. we flew to Maui the day after the wedding and chill there for another week.

That doze of 'happines' is not simple thing if she needs it injected regulary :) unless you are marrying a money spending machine and you have enough to allow that.

I would definitely put that cash for something to do together, say, a house downpayment.

It depends. I am looking at wedding costs now. For 100-150 guests $30K for a really nice wedding that includes everything including rooms at a destination is about right.

I believe that we all are doing enough rational thinking all day long and most of our lives... there are a few events that I think we should let our feelings take over - wedding, kids birth, etc...
so yeah, a house down payment would be always the better strategy, but we work our asses off to enjoy life, right?

This wedding ceremony took place in Kiev, Ukraine. Ah, since 1/2 of Brooklyn is from Odessa then prices can be compared :)

Here a wedding party for 200 people would cost me about $8k. I still wouldn't do it. Even if you throw an awesome party, 75% of the people will think it was shit, 10% will act like they did you a huge favor showing up to eat and drink for free, and the remaining will enjoy themselves. Plannign it all is very stressful, and if you are lucky you will make back maybe 3/4ths of the money in gifts.

It only means that throwing out 30k for drinks is easy for them.

Last time i had fun drinking and eating out was about $150 for 4. For 30k you can do that for a long time.

No, really, what a miserable down to earth behavior, why don't make it memorable by flying to New Zeland or Bora Bora, doing something that is really special, not just feed the bunch of trolls :)

I'm a traditionalist, I let my wife's father pay for it all. I also married up. Trophy husband!

it wasn't 30k.... it was about 10, i married some time ago... and that included a lot more than just drinking... a live band, professional dancers, 6 course meal, unlimited drinks for ~400 guests, the honey moon suite in the 5 star hotel, DJ, 3 photographers, 2 video cameras, and much much more little things.... maybe that stuff is just cheaper here :)

I don't feel like it's throwing money out... it's living the life ....
Been to Bora Bora before the wedding, but I see what you mean.

Oh and here it is a custom to get checks as gifts - so we got almost everything payed back anyway :D

This is the way to do it

https://youtube.com/watch?v=lBaI2...layer_embedded

We spent $25k on a renewal of vows at the Wynn in 2005. We had just made a killing on selling our house, so I went the extra mile and it was totally worth it.

It was a small ceremony and had 25 people there, however like I said it was a renewal of vows, so our children were part of it too and it made it extra special.

It's all in the timing. If you can't do it big at first like we couldn't, have a small courthouse wedding or something like that (we did the chapel on the LV strip since we lived there at the time) and then have a crazy party or celebrate it years later when you still love each other and maybe have more money. :)

No fucking way, are you nuts?

These days you are better 'eloping', having a party with friends and family when you get back, and put the money towards buying a home together.

I'm getting married in August and am very excited about our plans. We decided to take a cruise with our friends & family, get married at one of the cruise ports at a nice location and then feed all the guests brunch and champagne. This way we end up spending 5 days with everyone instead of just 1 whirlwind day. This cut down the guest list to the people who love us enough to spend money on a cruise and to spend 5 days with us, and has made it so much more special.

In the end we'll have spent just at $10K for flights, cruise expense, wedding location and decor and other misc like transport from the dock to the location, rings and attire, photographer and music, and a brunch reception for 50 people.

I feel like I've managed to arrange an awesome wedding and vacation for a bargain price.

No... :pimp