HELP!!! my g/f tried to ass-burglarize me!!
 

we were both in bed kind of fucked-up and she told me she loved fucking me but wanted to try something else, I said ok whatever thinking maybe a blindfold or something, then she proceeded to pull out a bic and tried to poke it up my ass! WTF!! :helpme

:eek7



pimpslap that ho!

Try it...you'll like it.

Enjoy the moment... you get anal sex without being accused of being gay.. except you just told us moron. :1orglaugh

Take it like a man.

Count yourself lucky it was'nt her fist

:thumbsup

Please keep your fantasies to yourself,

or a mongoose...

Was it Lit ?...did you squeel like a piglet and cum?

At least she didn't pull out a DICK and try to poke it up your ass.

THAT would be something to worry about! :1orglaugh

next time tell her to trim her nails short, use her finger (not a lighter), and apply spit liberally. :thumbsup

sorry guys, i have always thought men were built for anal sex(not necessarily gay by any means unless it's another dude you're doing it with). you'd be surprised by how many women are open to this and turned on to doing/trying it .....

how did you react? how did she react to your reaction???

Your gf stuck a LIGHTER up your ass!!!
Does she know that certain stores sell toys for anal play???

:1orglaugh

Probably farted and went back to sleep :)

just look at you... you curious little homo! :winkwink:

a pen perhaps?

thought your an anal virgin

no shit, i would think a lighter would not feel too great - the more i think about it. buy some anal beads or a slim vibrator. the key is keeping everything well lubed.

hehehe chickenshit, you only live once. try it out, you'll most likely end up liking it if you communicate with her enough and tell her what feels good and what hurts. :)

p1mpd0g will want pics!

count on dat

Go along with it by all means, but you'd better start thinking of good excuses in case something gets stuck up there. Trust me, you don't want to turn up at ER with something like "I'd just got out of the shower when I fell over and got a pokemon stuck up my ass".


About ten years ago, a relative of mine had to go to hospital after accidentally sitting on a knitting needle. I will never forget that.

Show us some pics so he cna try it out... lol

Damn, first kids kill their mother in the same style they did Ralphie in the Sopranos. Now you?re getting fucked by a bic. Next comes the strap on, Ralphie. You dirty nasty little whore, you know you want it. After all, you can't rape the willing!!!!

Warden

and necoeds will steal them

lol shieet, we need a full story here. its quite comical.

Sounds like she was just trying to stick a little gas up your ass.



:NopeNope

take it like a man

why don't you just admit that you liked it?

You should ask her to fist you.

How do you get that I'm not from my post? :1orglaugh
Perv :Graucho

I have the perfect site for you!

<a href="http://www.girlfucksguy.com">Girl Fucks Guy</a>

:1orglaugh :helpme :1orglaugh

ill never touch a BIC again

You're only gay if you take it

Oh, hold on....

!!!!!!!!

one of my friends who happens to be a girl told me that she'd like to put on a strap-on and fuck a guy in the ass. i dunno, i guess some girls like being on the giving end once in a while?

tip, If lit, dont fart
:glugglug

my girlfriend tried to do that shit to me the day after the prom. she told me to close my eyes and relax, and naturally im thinking i'm about to get some head from her for the first time. WRONG. she tried to stick her fucking finger in my ass. forgave her but i didnt forget, i still harrass her about that shit to this day

The cigarettes must taste even better now..

:Buck:

OH pu-leeze. Guys love it, will neve admit it, but they do. How could so many gay guys be wrong? Lotsa lube, a strap on, start small, they love it! :thumbsup

:eek7

I know what you're thinking. Scary isn't it? Not only did it fit nicely, but it felt damn good.

















Homo

hey at least it wasnt a zippo

Bic... Bic lighter... Bic pen or Bic shaver?
I would go for the shaver personally, mmmm, espially the razor side in first! Just tell her what some prude chicks I know say "Exit only!!!!"
ZoiNk

No shit, Pink...this reminds me of a story I read, about a doc who removed a lighter from a guy's ass in the ER one night. The next day, one of the nurses saw him outside taking a break and she walked up and said, "I heard about the guy with the lighter in his behind last night. Did you get it out for him?"

"Yes, I did," the doctor replied. Then he took out his smokes and lit one up, saying, "And look! It still works, too!"

:Graucho

off topic but i saw this guy on tv and a doctor found an eraser in his nose that had been there for at least 15 years! he shoved it in his nose when he was young and never realized it till he got an xray like 15 years later

I f she gets a pet gerbil dump her FAST!

You seem like you'd like it!

I read this thread twice today and it was funny both times.

now you can get some anal sex out of her: "your turn !!" thing

it was a jumbo lighter...

did you miss the part where I said "TRIED to poke it up my ass"

when I grabbed her hand I almost broke her wrist!

a lighter?

haha. that's hillarious! unless you've done that to her before!