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Old 06-11-2013, 10:18 AM   #51
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Old 06-11-2013, 10:19 AM   #52
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depends on the women
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Old 06-11-2013, 10:22 AM   #53
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I've been engaged for years, but can't actually be bothered with getting married.

I could easily go the rest of my life without doing it. It's just an expensive fancy dress party to me...
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Old 06-11-2013, 10:24 AM   #54
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I think in many cases age plays a major part in it. Young'uns in their 20's tend to prefer the girls with zero baggage, whereas the thirty-and-up crowd has a more relaxed view on the matter, generally speaking. I know I was exactly this way throughout those years.

Put it this way, if you're over 40 and single and are looking to date, unless you want to hook up with a flighty ditzy 25 yr old and have nothing in common, you've probably already found that limiting your choices to women with no kids gives you about 1/100th the options that you'd have if you were open to single moms. Because among the over 35 crowd of women out there, there are a lot of them.
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Old 06-11-2013, 10:28 AM   #55
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My relationship with a girl has nothing to do with children. Chances are if I had gotten to the point of marriage with a girl who has kids, the kids already like and approve of me, and I also like them, so why not?

Mothers always talk to their kids and if the kids don't like the guy, the relationship don't last long..
Taking on the responsability of raising a kid is freaking huge. You don't understand it until you have a teenager and can look back at the past ten years. Before you have a kid, you live for yourself - you decide where and when you want to eat; Every last choice is made by you for you. When you are a parent every decision is influenced by your kid - You can't go out to the bar at 11pm to eat because you have to make sure you kid eats at 6pm and is in bed before 9pm so they are ready for school.

Weekends aren't about what I want to do, it's about what my kids plans are. If my kid has a sporting event out of town it could be an all day or all weekend event. Weekends are spent at football games and week days with school events and practice. Then you run your kid around to school events, friend's houses, birthday parties, then factor in doctors appointments, dentists... It becomes very time consuming quickly.
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Old 06-11-2013, 10:32 AM   #56
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Put it this way, if you're over 40 and single and are looking to date, unless you want to hook up with a flighty ditzy 25 yr old and have nothing in common, you've probably already found that limiting your choices to women with no kids gives you about 1/100th the options that you'd have if you were open to single moms. Because among the over 35 crowd of women out there, there are a lot of them.
That's the main reason I date either younger women or tourists looking for a good time. I have never yet been in a relationship where one of the kids wasn't a nightmare personality wise and looking to me for a new car, money or an ex that wasn't a lunatic.

Maybe if I met a widow with a normal kid I would feel different.


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Old 06-11-2013, 10:52 AM   #57
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Do not raise another mans son you will never get credit for any of that shit.
Who raises kids to "get credit"? If you are really good and really lucky, then you will have a deep and positive impact on those kids lives, and you will earn their love. What other "credit" are you talking about???








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Old 06-11-2013, 10:56 AM   #58
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Seems like a common occurrence around here(everywhere?), and I don't get it... Why would anyone choose to raise some other mans child instead of their own? Am I missing something here?
1) I won't marry, living together is better.
2) Enough choice of woman without kids
3) Have you seen this?

So i prefer woman without kids.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:06 AM   #59
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1) I won't marry, living together is better.
2) Enough choice of woman without kids
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:13 AM   #60
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I couldn't imagine being married or having anything to do with children on any level.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:16 AM   #61
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Is it even a real question? Do you mean if I had a choice to snap my fingers and either marry a woman who has a child or the same woman without? Is she fertile? Am I? What other factors are involved? This is a classic "it depends" on a million levels.

There is nothing wrong with marrying a woman who has children. There, that covers everything.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:26 AM   #62
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Seems like a common occurrence around here(everywhere?), and I don't get it... Why would anyone choose to raise some other mans child instead of their own? Am I missing something here?
Because they get to shag the kids on the side and the mom looks the other way to avoid messing up a good thing.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:32 AM   #63
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If you have to marry a woman that has kids, then somewhere in life you fucked up. People that don't fuck up usually find other people who have not fucked up (at least yet) and marry them. There are plenty of good women out there that don't have kids yet, so unless you want a woman with kids, or already have kids of your own, there is really no excuse to settle for a woman with kids.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:34 AM   #64
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My father died when I was a baby, and my mother remarried. My step father raised me from when I was a young child and I didn't really know he was my step father until I was much older.

The woman I dated before my wife had a child, and I loved playing daddy. I didn't have any issues raising someone else's kid. It's very noble.
yeah depends on the kid and kids age for sure
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:34 AM   #65
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I couldn't imagine being married or having anything to do with children on any level.
you should hear what the kids been saying about you
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:35 AM   #66
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Only losers raise other men's children.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:42 AM   #67
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If you have to marry a woman that has kids, then somewhere in life you fucked up. People that don't fuck up usually find other people who have not fucked up (at least yet) and marry them. There are plenty of good women out there that don't have kids yet, so unless you want a woman with kids, or already have kids of your own, there is really no excuse to settle for a woman with kids.
well really the only 'fuck up' is waiting too long to find someone to 'settle down' with. women past their mid 30's without kids are typically headcases or have had some kind of crazy life.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:44 AM   #68
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Do not raise another mans son you will never get credit for any of that shit.
You are pretty clueless.
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:46 AM   #69
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If you have to marry a woman that has kids
Who "has to" get married?
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:46 AM   #70
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Only losers raise other men's children.
Ill tell my step dad who raised me like his own son since my third. Who took care o me and made sure me and my sis go all we needed. Who was there when needed unlike my "real" dad who ive never seen again. What a loser my step dad is, geez.

Really nothing wrong with marrying a woman who has kids IMO
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:46 AM   #71
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Old 06-11-2013, 11:58 AM   #72
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Old 06-11-2013, 12:22 PM   #73
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A looser will never succeed in bringing up other man's child, its a hell of a job!
But if you gained that kid's respect and love he may be the most devoted and loving kid you'll ever have.
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Old 06-11-2013, 12:27 PM   #74
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A looser will never succeed in bringing up other man's child, its a hell of a job!
But if you gained that kid's respect and love he may be the most devoted and loving kid you'll ever have.
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Old 06-11-2013, 12:39 PM   #75
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well really the only 'fuck up' is waiting too long to find someone to 'settle down' with. women past their mid 30's without kids are typically headcases or have had some kind of crazy life.
This is true. Men and women who have waited to long to settle down are usually people who have passed up good catches in the past because every time they thought they could do better. Never realizing the people they were passing up were actually better than them. And that is a form of fucking up. And your absolutely right about bitches in their 30's.
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Old 06-11-2013, 12:41 PM   #76
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If you marry a woman with other mans children then he might have rights to see them. That means you might have to let him into your house.

Also if you financially support this other kid then maybe you might not have enough left to support producing your own.

I think if you got kids yourself then it is okay.......

Also depends on your own age, her age, money etc etc

Is she a good girl, or is she a whore.......

Then again, you must like the girl if you are asking if you should marry her not then what is the problem.
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Old 06-11-2013, 12:43 PM   #77
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If you marry a woman with other mans children then he might have rights to see them. That means you might have to let him into your house.
Is there anything you know anything about?
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Old 06-11-2013, 01:03 PM   #78
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Yes, you are missing something. Maturity.
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Old 06-11-2013, 01:53 PM   #79
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Who raises kids to "get credit"? If you are really good and really lucky, then you will have a deep and positive impact on those kids lives, and you will earn their love. What other "credit" are you talking about???.
What planet are you from! - Earn their love? - Really dude ?
Cruise on down to the projects with that mentality and watch how fast you get your ass capped by those loving, darling kids.
Your ass will be laying there with no shoes, no wallet, bleeding like a stuffed pig while your lady is hitting the stem.
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Old 06-11-2013, 02:48 PM   #80
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I would I guess, I'd prefer a girl without a kid but it wouldn't be a deal breaker.
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Old 06-11-2013, 03:33 PM   #81
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no kids wanted at all
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Old 06-11-2013, 03:50 PM   #82
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every child deserves loving a set of parents/caretakers/roll models
bravo to those who are open minded
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Old 06-11-2013, 04:52 PM   #83
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That depends. Does her ass look like this?

not if she has had kids it wont
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Old 06-11-2013, 05:30 PM   #84
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Why the heck do you have to marry her??
Like this gentleman said...
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Old 06-11-2013, 05:32 PM   #85
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No baby daddy drama for me..
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Old 06-11-2013, 07:40 PM   #86
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Thanks to the discovery of DNA in the Fifties and economical ways to determine paternity more recently, some pretty shocking statistics have emerged that don't get much press attention. It's pretty embarrassing to all involved.

A very, very significant number of American husbands have been raising other men's children for many decades. They just didn't know it.

There's no way to know if those were happy homes, happy families, and happy marriages, but surely a great many of them were.
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Old 06-12-2013, 04:51 AM   #87
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What planet are you from! - Earn their love? - Really dude ?
Cruise on down to the projects with that mentality and watch how fast you get your ass capped by those loving, darling kids.
Your ass will be laying there with no shoes, no wallet, bleeding like a stuffed pig while your lady is hitting the stem.
What are you talking about? What kind of girl are YOU planning to marry? Why would I marry a girl that would raise children like that? It's takes a certain kind of person to mold those kind of kids. The question of the thread wasn't, "would you marry any girl no matter what she is like, how ignorant she is, or that would raise her kids to be uncivilized animals?" Do you think that every single mom out there is on crack in the ghetto? What silly stereotypes have you bought into? The majority are divorced, middle class, perfectly normal people.


, and again, my answer was to the post about "getting credit" for "raising someone else's kids". I have a few friends that have married women that had children, and I've had friends that were raised by a step-dad, and, just like with people raising their own children, it worked out badly in some cases, and in others there was a ton of love and wonderful lives together.

My point is that these sweeping generalizations are nuts, and the fact that people here think of raising children as "getting credit", probably shouldn't have them for a while until they grow up a bit.



.


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Old 06-12-2013, 04:55 AM   #88
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yep been there done that
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Old 06-12-2013, 06:19 AM   #89
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Thanks to the discovery of DNA in the Fifties and economical ways to determine paternity more recently, some pretty shocking statistics have emerged that don't get much press attention. It's pretty embarrassing to all involved.

A very, very significant number of American husbands have been raising other men's children for many decades. They just didn't know it.

I can believe that no problem at all...
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Old 06-12-2013, 06:31 AM   #90
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Thanks to the discovery of DNA in the Fifties and economical ways to determine paternity more recently, some pretty shocking statistics have emerged that don't get much press attention. It's pretty embarrassing to all involved.

A very, very significant number of American husbands have been raising other men's children for many decades. They just didn't know it.

There's no way to know if those were happy homes, happy families, and happy marriages, but surely a great many of them were.
i think all kids should be given paternity tests shortly after birth.
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Old 06-12-2013, 08:51 AM   #91
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I would ask to do a DNA test if a woman said he was pregnant from me. Or just run and don't look back. Or both, not decided yet cause it didn't happen.
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Old 06-12-2013, 09:44 AM   #92
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Thanks to the discovery of DNA in the Fifties and economical ways to determine paternity more recently, some pretty shocking statistics have emerged that don't get much press attention. It's pretty embarrassing to all involved.

A very, very significant number of American husbands have been raising other men's children for many decades. They just didn't know it.

There's no way to know if those were happy homes, happy families, and happy marriages, but surely a great many of them were.
^ nothing to do with this thread obviously, but now I'm curious - what number is this significant number?
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Old 06-12-2013, 10:25 AM   #93
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That's the main reason I date either younger women or tourists looking for a good time. I have never yet been in a relationship where one of the kids wasn't a nightmare personality wise and looking to me for a new car, money or an ex that wasn't a lunatic.
In the end you'll likely come to the same conclusion most do, that it's a no-win and rather empty life dating much younger women. For one thing the type of young women that are into guys 15+ years older than themselves are rife with 'issues' let's just say.

But you're right, the single mom set is also rife with troubled kids. Life is a crapshoot.

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Maybe if I met a widow with a normal kid I would feel different..
There are always plenty of those around. And thanks to the half dozen wars and brief skirmishes going on around the world at any given time lately there are even more than usual. Last time I looked on match.com I was surprised to see that many, actually.
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Old 06-12-2013, 10:26 AM   #94
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Its all depend how the lady is.
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Old 06-12-2013, 11:22 AM   #95
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Bitch pleazzzze! Don't get married in the first place.....
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Old 06-13-2013, 09:49 AM   #96
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^ nothing to do with this thread obviously, but now I'm curious - what number is this significant number?
Most of the published estimates vary from the range of 2 or 3 percent to 7 percent. I've seen higher figures - the largest one at 10%. The imprecision comes, I think, from the fact that no one has aimed at learning this number and the data comes as a consequence of other kinds of research. The reason I didn't post a number above is because nobody knows exactly. Whether one or two out of fifty is a significant number is a matter of opinion and you know mine.

The ancient Romans always punished wifely adultery much more harshly than male infidelity and the stated reason was that such pregnancies amounted to a fraud on the husband who was the putative father.
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Old 06-13-2013, 10:04 AM   #97
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Why not? It's not like the kid is some kind of disease is it? What prevents you from loving the kid as well just because it isn't yours? What a strange question and attitude.
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