How do self-employed people make friends? - GoFuckYourself.com

bausch · 11-25-2007, 08:13 AM

I was wondering this... For people who work at home, such as myself, how the hell do you make new friends if you work at home by yourself and don't go to college and don't go to conventions etc? I'm talking about regular friends outside the industry.

It seems like most friendships are formed in younger years, like through college or childhood friends, but if you never made friends during those years, how are you supposed to start new ones, it seems harder the older you get...

Also, no, I don't have activities that I enjoy doing that I could join groups for etc Also I don't want to meet friends through Craiglist/internet, I find that creepy.

Spudman · 11-25-2007, 08:16 AM

through hobbies, then you have a common interest to talk about, i snowboard/mountain bike and meet loads of people through that.
also meet people through local music scene, going to watch bands etc.

C_U_Next_Tuesday · 11-25-2007, 08:16 AM

I met most of my friends on a hiking site. They dont live near me, but we do travel to get out and see each other several times a year. I got a job outside of home just to get out and socialize with people who arent talking about pussies and dicks all day.

Evil E · 11-25-2007, 08:17 AM

Just start doing something new(sport or activity). Plenty of girls in yoga, tae-bo or salsa classes.

hateman · 11-25-2007, 08:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bausch

How do self-employed people make friends?

World of Warcraft!

Herb Kornfield · 11-25-2007, 08:23 AM

Hobbies ... best way to meet new people

bausch · 11-25-2007, 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hateman

World of Warcraft!

Real-life friends, not interweb friends.

bausch · 11-25-2007, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Herb Kornfield

Hobbies ... best way to meet new people

I don't have many hobbies, I guess I'll have to try developing some.

buzzy · 11-25-2007, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spudman

i snowboard

What you boarding with?

polish_aristocrat · 11-25-2007, 08:33 AM

working from home and being your own boss is great if you already have tons of friends but meeting new ones may be hard indeed

but you can try the online route, both via dating sites, social networks and online communities, in 21st century its not really creepy anymore

or just take some courses somewhere, or even a job on the side.. or perhaps some charity, if you dont feel like working for anyone else
or just do some sports etc

or the traditional way, just go outside on the weekend... but then it helps if you already have some friends to start with

BTW in your case it may also help if you change your attitude a little, perhaps some consultation may help, because if you are concerned with so little things as that the grocery cashier didn't greet you, then you are probably an over-sensitive person, and perhaps changing that , changing yourself can be the first step before meeting new friends

k0nr4d · 11-25-2007, 08:37 AM

I've had no problem making friends being self-employed. Most of the friends I have here I met through my cousins, or while picking up girls at nightclubs.

bausch · 11-25-2007, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by k0nr4d

I've had no problem making friends being self-employed. Most of the friends I have here I met through my cousins, or while picking up girls at nightclubs.

I don't want to go clubbing by myself though, I think most people go in groups or at least with one other person... I would really weird going by myself.

PSSuperstars · 11-25-2007, 08:40 AM

The gym

Hire a personal trainer for a few months.. You'll meet their other clients... and you'll meet friends in classes and while working out on your own..

It saved my sanity.

Antonio · 11-25-2007, 08:40 AM

HBO is my friend

bausch · 11-25-2007, 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PSSuperstars

The gym

Hire a personal trainer for a few months.. You'll meet their other clients... and you'll meet friends in classes and while working out on your own..

It saved my sanity.

I go to the gym already, the gym at the building I live also has free yoga lessons, cardio scultp and spinning classes although I never took those because you have to make reservations with the concierge and I was too lazy.

I do go to the gym there, there's lots of people there but I never meet anyone at the gym. Everyone at the gym (including me) wears an ipod and keeps to themselves. I don't feel comfortable starting conversation with the people there because it would be interrupting their workout etc and I would feel weird.

bobby666 · 11-25-2007, 09:02 AM

i need no friends

Spudman · 11-25-2007, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buzzy

What you boarding with?

i've got a burton custom board with burton mission bindings, its fucking sweet man, i can do anything on my board, park, off piste, anything

bausch · 11-25-2007, 09:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by polish_aristocrat

if you are concerned with so little things as that the grocery cashier didn't greet you, then you are probably an over-sensitive person, and perhaps changing that , changing yourself can be the first step before meeting new friends

I think I'm sensitive though because I have no life. If someone has a "life" and a lot of friends/activities to engage in then they would be too busy with their lives to worry about not being greeted, but since I don't have a life, I tend to notice and over-analyze everything because I have nothing else to occupy my mind with.

hjnet · 11-25-2007, 09:14 AM

stillsexy · 11-25-2007, 09:14 AM

The Sims

u-Bob · 11-25-2007, 09:18 AM

gfy is a good place to make friends

he-fox · 11-25-2007, 09:20 AM

I made many new friends at the beach, beach bars, clubs

Dvae · 11-25-2007, 09:21 AM

friends are over rated. who needs them?

Telly · 11-25-2007, 09:24 AM

just throw on a backpack, walk around the campus center of your closes college and bitch in the cafeteria line about some class and talk to the chick next to you.

If she doesn't like your conversation at least she'll like the lsd you slip into her coffee.

I'm totally joking though, don't drop lsd into that hot girl's coffee. honestly. dont.

bausch · 11-25-2007, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashpimps

just throw on a backpack, walk around the campus center of your closes college and bitch in the cafeteria line about some class and talk to the chick next to you.

If she doesn't like your conversation at least she'll like the lsd you slip into her coffee.

I'm totally joking though, don't drop lsd into that hot girl's coffee. honestly. dont.

I also mean make friends of your own gender, not just of the opposite sex, but friends of your own gender you can talk to and go out with etc.

buzzy · 11-25-2007, 09:32 AM

Alcahol always does the trick if you are afraid of talking to people.

starpimps · 11-25-2007, 09:33 AM

i goto university take acouple classes to hang out with them bitches

quantum-x · 11-25-2007, 09:35 AM

It's an interesting one, for sure.
I had a few hobbies in AU, such as dance / exploration / pilates etc, which were ok for meeting people, but in France, it's a little harder. The effort of forcing myself to head out to meet people etc, especially 'en seul' is a right pain in the ass, and it's also making my language aquisition suffer for it.

BVF · 11-25-2007, 09:49 AM

I started taking up Judo again to give myself some physical activity...I will also start taking classes next semester in preparation for my PhD....Sitting in the house is relaxing but it gets you nowhere socially.

xmas13 · 11-25-2007, 10:08 AM

Get a dog

Why · 11-25-2007, 10:22 AM

hobbies, bars, clubs, parks, grocerie stores...

if you dont force yourself to go do it your social skills will start to suffer. like anything else, making friends takes practice.

rayadp05 · 11-25-2007, 10:23 AM

Think of something that you like. Something that makes you happy. Surely, there is something out there that makes you happy. Whatever it is, believe me, there are other people that like it too. It just becomes a matter of finding out where those other people go to enjoy what it is that you both like. For example, if you are into metal, rock or hip hop bands, go out to a nightclub that specilaizes in the type of music that you like. As far as not wanting to go by yourself, just give it a try. Maybe you will meet someone there and then the next time, you guys could go together. Good luck to you bro...and keep your chin up.

uno · 11-25-2007, 10:27 AM

bars, clubs, parties, restaurants, friends of friends, friends of family, hobbies, random people i meet on the street, it doesn't matter. I meet people wherever i go.

Shagbunny · 11-25-2007, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bausch

I was wondering this... For people who work at home, such as myself, how the hell do you make new friends if you work at home by yourself and don't go to college and don't go to conventions etc? I'm talking about regular friends outside the industry.

It seems like most friendships are formed in younger years, like through college or childhood friends, but if you never made friends during those years, how are you supposed to start new ones, it seems harder the older you get...

Also, no, I don't have activities that I enjoy doing that I could join groups for etc Also I don't want to meet friends through Craiglist/internet, I find that creepy.

it's nearly impossible, only people i see working at home daily are all the UPS/Purolator couriers that come to my door and the cashiers at the store. It's nearly impossible to start AND keep new friendships

million · 11-25-2007, 10:41 AM

buy a dog

Shagbunny · 11-25-2007, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashpimps

just throw on a backpack, walk around the campus center of your closes college and bitch in the cafeteria line about some class and talk to the chick next to you.

If she doesn't like your conversation at least she'll like the lsd you slip into her coffee.

I'm totally joking though, don't drop lsd into that hot girl's coffee. honestly. dont.

so what should i drop instead?

Babaganoosh · 11-25-2007, 10:43 AM

If you have time for friends, you aren't busy enough. Get back to work!!!

Shagbunny · 11-25-2007, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by million

buy a dog

or a couple of kitties!

Lighter · 11-25-2007, 10:51 AM

Webmasters dont have the best social skills ehhh

Babaganoosh · 11-25-2007, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lighter

Webmasters dont have the best social skills ehhh

Very, very true.

bronco67 · 11-25-2007, 10:57 AM

For me its playing on 3 different softball teams...Spring Summer Fall.

justFred · 11-25-2007, 10:57 AM

start by crashing a party and find the OTHER guy that has no friends, and talk to him. this is your "safe" bet.

if he's cool, get contact info and hang out again. You now have 1 friend, go to a bar/club/party/whatever interests you with other people, bring him as a safety net, and try to meet new people.

tony286 · 11-25-2007, 11:09 AM

I would say join things and get involved,thats how you will meet others.The older you get the harder it gets.

webgurl · 11-25-2007, 11:10 AM

This is a real good thread cause i find myself wondering this
alot as well . I am glad i recently found a really cool group of
poker buddies i now hangout with .

baddog · 11-25-2007, 11:11 AM

go to church

The Heron · 11-25-2007, 12:06 PM

Someone else mentioned charity, that's a damn good idea.
College is easy depending on your own age, just take a class or two.
Use what you already have, relatives and friends can intro you to others.

My personal favorite is lots of alcohol and nightlife but you need to have the social skills and an assload of ego to do it right. Do NOT be the wallflower, that's gay.

Fizzgig · 11-25-2007, 12:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bausch

I was wondering this... For people who work at home, such as myself, how the hell do you make new friends if you work at home by yourself and don't go to college and don't go to conventions etc? I'm talking about regular friends outside the industry.

It seems like most friendships are formed in younger years, like through college or childhood friends, but if you never made friends during those years, how are you supposed to start new ones, it seems harder the older you get...

Also, no, I don't have activities that I enjoy doing that I could join groups for etc Also I don't want to meet friends through Craiglist/internet, I find that creepy.

Find local online communities with similar interests. There are probably message boards for people in your area for almost every religion, hobby, political group, sexual deviation, dating, sports, etc. etc.

You can find these groups which will often have in-person gatherings, public and private. Just look for people with common interests.

Peaches · 11-25-2007, 12:13 PM

At LEAST 95% of my friends aren't in the industry. I have friends I went to kindergarten with. I know probably 100 people who are self employed and they have plenty of friends and I've seen people who work in corporations with 1000's of employees but only a handful of friends. It has more to do with your personality than your job. You can make friends ANYWHERE!!

uno · 11-25-2007, 12:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lighter

Webmasters dont have the best social skills ehhh

Not necessarily true. I've found that designers usually have decent social skills while programmers were a bit more on the lacking side.

Granted its not a universal truth, just a stereotype that has fit a lot of my experiences.

D · 11-25-2007, 12:21 PM

It takes 50 to realize there's life outside of work

11-25-2007, 08:13 AM	#1
bausch Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 3,017	How do self-employed people make friends? I was wondering this... For people who work at home, such as myself, how the hell do you make new friends if you work at home by yourself and don't go to college and don't go to conventions etc? I'm talking about regular friends outside the industry. It seems like most friendships are formed in younger years, like through college or childhood friends, but if you never made friends during those years, how are you supposed to start new ones, it seems harder the older you get... Also, no, I don't have activities that I enjoy doing that I could join groups for etc Also I don't want to meet friends through Craiglist/internet, I find that creepy.

11-25-2007, 08:16 AM	#2
Spudman Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: UK Posts: 3,198	through hobbies, then you have a common interest to talk about, i snowboard/mountain bike and meet loads of people through that. also meet people through local music scene, going to watch bands etc. __________________ Take it Easy !!!

11-25-2007, 08:17 AM	#4
Evil E Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Lazyness is a lifestyle Posts: 3,201	Just start doing something new(sport or activity). Plenty of girls in yoga, tae-bo or salsa classes. __________________ A girl once told me "Give me 8 inches and make it HURT". So, I fucked her twice and hit her with a brick.

11-25-2007, 08:33 AM	#10
polish_aristocrat Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 40,377	working from home and being your own boss is great if you already have tons of friends but meeting new ones may be hard indeed but you can try the online route, both via dating sites, social networks and online communities, in 21st century its not really creepy anymore or just take some courses somewhere, or even a job on the side.. or perhaps some charity, if you dont feel like working for anyone else or just do some sports etc or the traditional way, just go outside on the weekend... but then it helps if you already have some friends to start with BTW in your case it may also help if you change your attitude a little, perhaps some consultation may help, because if you are concerned with so little things as that the grocery cashier didn't greet you, then you are probably an over-sensitive person, and perhaps changing that , changing yourself can be the first step before meeting new friends __________________ I don't use ICQ anymore.

11-25-2007, 08:37 AM	#11
k0nr4d Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Poland Posts: 9,228	I've had no problem making friends being self-employed. Most of the friends I have here I met through my cousins, or while picking up girls at nightclubs. __________________ Mechanical Bunny Media Mechbunny Tube Script \| Mechbunny Webcam Aggregator Script \| Custom Web Development

11-25-2007, 08:16 AM	#3
C_U_Next_Tuesday WW4L Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: over the river and through the woods Posts: 10,581	I met most of my friends on a hiking site. They dont live near me, but we do travel to get out and see each other several times a year. I got a job outside of home just to get out and socialize with people who arent talking about pussies and dicks all day.

11-25-2007, 08:23 AM	#6
Herb Kornfield Is on the 1 Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Philly Burbs Posts: 4,996	Hobbies ... best way to meet new people

11-25-2007, 08:40 AM	#13
PSSuperstars Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 1,477	The gym Hire a personal trainer for a few months.. You'll meet their other clients... and you'll meet friends in classes and while working out on your own.. It saved my sanity. __________________ Porn's Best Kept Secret : PSOCash.com : Make Money Promoting Phone Sex in Members Areas, TGPs, and MORE! : Lifetime 30% Payout *Best Webcam Referral Payouts*

11-25-2007, 08:40 AM	#14
Antonio Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Spartaaaaaaaaa Posts: 14,136	HBO is my friend

11-25-2007, 09:02 AM	#16
bobby666 boots are my religion Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Heart of europe Posts: 21,765	i need no friends __________________

11-25-2007, 09:14 AM	#19
hjnet Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: European Union Posts: 3,815

11-25-2007, 09:14 AM	#20
stillsexy Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 1,913	The Sims __________________

11-25-2007, 09:18 AM	#21
u-Bob there's no $$$ in porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: icq: 195./568.-230 (btw: not getting offline msgs) Posts: 33,063	gfy is a good place to make friends

11-25-2007, 09:20 AM	#22
he-fox Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Playa del Carmen, Mexico Posts: 2,884	I made many new friends at the beach, beach bars, clubs

11-25-2007, 09:21 AM	#23
Dvae Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: US Posts: 5,326	friends are over rated. who needs them?

11-25-2007, 09:24 AM	#24
Telly Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 334	just throw on a backpack, walk around the campus center of your closes college and bitch in the cafeteria line about some class and talk to the chick next to you. If she doesn't like your conversation at least she'll like the lsd you slip into her coffee. I'm totally joking though, don't drop lsd into that hot girl's coffee. honestly. dont. __________________ MetroMoney.com - Limited-time $40PPS Promotion! DeviantHardcore.com

11-25-2007, 09:32 AM	#26
buzzy Confirmed User Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 2,606	Alcahol always does the trick if you are afraid of talking to people.

11-25-2007, 09:33 AM	#27
starpimps Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: internets Posts: 6,954	i goto university take acouple classes to hang out with them bitches __________________ Teen Porn Models / Solo Girls

11-25-2007, 09:35 AM	#28
quantum-x Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: ICQ: 251425 Fr/Au/Ca Posts: 6,863	It's an interesting one, for sure. I had a few hobbies in AU, such as dance / exploration / pilates etc, which were ok for meeting people, but in France, it's a little harder. The effort of forcing myself to head out to meet people etc, especially 'en seul' is a right pain in the ass, and it's also making my language aquisition suffer for it. Last edited by Ice; 02-05-2008 at 11:27 AM..

11-25-2007, 09:49 AM	#29
BVF Black Vagina Finder Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: The Midwest Posts: 13,975	I started taking up Judo again to give myself some physical activity...I will also start taking classes next semester in preparation for my PhD....Sitting in the house is relaxing but it gets you nowhere socially. __________________ Black Pussy Click On Mr Cosby..CCbill, 60/40, 136 FHG's....The Cos Loves Black Ghetto Pussy!!

11-25-2007, 10:08 AM	#30
xmas13 Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: GFY Posts: 5,176	Get a dog __________________ ICQ 557504926

11-25-2007, 10:22 AM	#31
Why MFBA Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: PNW Posts: 7,230	hobbies, bars, clubs, parks, grocerie stores... if you dont force yourself to go do it your social skills will start to suffer. like anything else, making friends takes practice.

11-25-2007, 10:23 AM	#32
rayadp05 TRUEAMATEURMODELS.COM Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: TrueAmateurModels.com Posts: 4,187	Think of something that you like. Something that makes you happy. Surely, there is something out there that makes you happy. Whatever it is, believe me, there are other people that like it too. It just becomes a matter of finding out where those other people go to enjoy what it is that you both like. For example, if you are into metal, rock or hip hop bands, go out to a nightclub that specilaizes in the type of music that you like. As far as not wanting to go by yourself, just give it a try. Maybe you will meet someone there and then the next time, you guys could go together. Good luck to you bro...and keep your chin up. __________________ TrueAmateurModels.com Twitter TrueAmateurModels.com Affiliate Program

11-25-2007, 10:27 AM	#33
uno RIP Dodger. BEST.CAT.EVER Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: NYC Area Posts: 18,450	bars, clubs, parties, restaurants, friends of friends, friends of family, hobbies, random people i meet on the street, it doesn't matter. I meet people wherever i go. __________________ -uno icq: 111-914 CrazyBabe.com - porn art MojoHost - For all your hosting needs, present and future. Tell them I sent ya!

11-25-2007, 10:41 AM	#35
million Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Pornyland Posts: 789	buy a dog __________________ <sig spot goes here>

11-25-2007, 10:43 AM	#37
Babaganoosh ♥♥♥ Likes Hugs ♥♥♥ Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: /home Posts: 15,841	If you have time for friends, you aren't busy enough. Get back to work!!! __________________ I like pie.

11-25-2007, 10:51 AM	#39
Lighter Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 207	Webmasters dont have the best social skills ehhh

11-25-2007, 10:57 AM	#41
bronco67 Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 29,032	For me its playing on 3 different softball teams...Spring Summer Fall.

11-25-2007, 10:57 AM	#42
justFred Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 922	start by crashing a party and find the OTHER guy that has no friends, and talk to him. this is your "safe" bet. if he's cool, get contact info and hang out again. You now have 1 friend, go to a bar/club/party/whatever interests you with other people, bring him as a safety net, and try to meet new people. __________________ Vote Bill Cosby 2012

11-25-2007, 11:09 AM	#43
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	I would say join things and get involved,thats how you will meet others.The older you get the harder it gets.

11-25-2007, 11:10 AM	#44
webgurl Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Clouds with Carebears Posts: 7,954	This is a real good thread cause i find myself wondering this alot as well . I am glad i recently found a really cool group of poker buddies i now hangout with .

11-25-2007, 11:11 AM	#45
baddog So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: the beach, SoCal Posts: 107,089	go to church

11-25-2007, 12:06 PM	#46
The Heron Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Michigan Posts: 4,487	Someone else mentioned charity, that's a damn good idea. College is easy depending on your own age, just take a class or two. Use what you already have, relatives and friends can intro you to others. My personal favorite is lots of alcohol and nightlife but you need to have the social skills and an assload of ego to do it right. Do NOT be the wallflower, that's gay.

11-25-2007, 12:13 PM	#48
Peaches Old broad Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Away Posts: 13,933	At LEAST 95% of my friends aren't in the industry. I have friends I went to kindergarten with. I know probably 100 people who are self employed and they have plenty of friends and I've seen people who work in corporations with 1000's of employees but only a handful of friends. It has more to do with your personality than your job. You can make friends ANYWHERE!!

11-25-2007, 12:21 PM	#50
D Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Valley Posts: 7,412	It takes 50 to realize there's life outside of work __________________ -D. ICQ: 202-96-31