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Old 03-29-2011, 09:53 AM   #1
CheeseFrog
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Fuck I just got owned at work v.Facial Recognition Software

some of you may already know i got a laptop with tha facial recognition software. well, just now i was browsting some tube8 vids and the mail delivery girl walks over and hands me my mail. i quickly minimize my shit but the fucking live jazmine chick is still there. i panic and just hit ctrl alt delete enter to lock the machine. she hands me my mail and then starts fucking chit-chatting. without thinking i look over and the camera unlocks my machine, with the fucking livejazmine chick sitting there chatting. horrified, the mailgirl looks at it, and then storms out. im sitting here fucking scared as fuck. im pretty sure shes gonna write an email to HR, who just happens to be on vacation now, but shes going to be back on friday friday gotta get down on friday, everybody?s lookin? forward to the weekend, weekend party party yea. but not me.
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Old 03-29-2011, 09:55 AM   #2
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lmaoooo got me
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Old 03-29-2011, 09:55 AM   #3
tical
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hahaha that's awesome

just say your computer has a virus and keeps popping up stuff like that

----

edit: damnit i just re-read that last line hahah
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Old 03-29-2011, 09:57 AM   #4
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fun fun fun
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Old 03-29-2011, 09:58 AM   #5
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I don't get it ...
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:04 AM   #6
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haha nice :D
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:12 AM   #7
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Was I just Rebecca Rolled?
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:12 AM   #8
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:18 AM   #9
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Fuck. Please don't make this stupid cunt any more viral than she already is.
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:19 AM   #10
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Bitches be all lookin at your screen n shit.
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:26 AM   #11
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Just tell them that you opened an email you believed to be work related and that popped up. I'm sure you have an alternate email address. Change your computer clock and send an email to your work address. Put in the subject line something that may look work related and include a link to anything porn, but mask it. Then if HR asks any questions simply tell them you opened an email, that popped up, you quickly closed it and scanned your system for viruses. And that it will never happen again.

You'll be fine...don't get an ulcer. I accidentally sent everyone in my company a porn link and just told them it must have been a virus. The IT department looked at my computer and couldn't say yes or no therefore I kept my job.

Or you can just call the bitch a liar and say you rebuffed her advances and she swore to make your life hell. I have an anonymous emailer. Give me her email address and I'll send emails making it look like they came from her and make her look like a complete stalker.
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:40 AM   #12
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lolz... this thread made me laugh.
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:43 AM   #13
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ummm, so you're publicly admitting you don't work in online adult?
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:47 AM   #14
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LoL
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:51 AM   #15
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ummm, so you're publicly admitting you don't work in online adult?
Some people work day jobs to finance their online ventures. He could work mainstream during the day and adult online at night.
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Old 03-29-2011, 10:52 AM   #16
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Just tell them that you opened an email you believed to be work related and that popped up. I'm sure you have an alternate email address. Change your computer clock and send an email to your work address. Put in the subject line something that may look work related and include a link to anything porn, but mask it. Then if HR asks any questions simply tell them you opened an email, that popped up, you quickly closed it and scanned your system for viruses. And that it will never happen again.

You'll be fine...don't get an ulcer. I accidentally sent everyone in my company a porn link and just told them it must have been a virus. The IT department looked at my computer and couldn't say yes or no therefore I kept my job.

Or you can just call the bitch a liar and say you rebuffed her advances and she swore to make your life hell. I have an anonymous emailer. Give me her email address and I'll send emails making it look like they came from her and make her look like a complete stalker.
F'ing genius right there
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:22 AM   #17
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Some of these replies are making me rofl
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:26 AM   #18
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Pasta win... now I want some italian.
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:30 AM   #19
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Just tell them that you opened an email you believed to be work related and that popped up. I'm sure you have an alternate email address. Change your computer clock and send an email to your work address. Put in the subject line something that may look work related and include a link to anything porn, but mask it. Then if HR asks any questions simply tell them you opened an email, that popped up, you quickly closed it and scanned your system for viruses. And that it will never happen again.

You'll be fine...don't get an ulcer. I accidentally sent everyone in my company a porn link and just told them it must have been a virus. The IT department looked at my computer and couldn't say yes or no therefore I kept my job.

Or you can just call the bitch a liar and say you rebuffed her advances and she swore to make your life hell. I have an anonymous emailer. Give me her email address and I'll send emails making it look like they came from her and make her look like a complete stalker.

I like the way you think.
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:33 AM   #20
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Lol WTF?
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:36 AM   #21
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remove that life ruin app
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:54 AM   #22
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Maybe its time to work adult full time
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Old 03-29-2011, 11:58 AM   #23
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Just tell them that you opened an email you believed to be work related and that popped up. I'm sure you have an alternate email address. Change your computer clock and send an email to your work address. Put in the subject line something that may look work related and include a link to anything porn, but mask it. Then if HR asks any questions simply tell them you opened an email, that popped up, you quickly closed it and scanned your system for viruses. And that it will never happen again.

You'll be fine...don't get an ulcer. I accidentally sent everyone in my company a porn link and just told them it must have been a virus. The IT department looked at my computer and couldn't say yes or no therefore I kept my job.

Or you can just call the bitch a liar and say you rebuffed her advances and she swore to make your life hell. I have an anonymous emailer. Give me her email address and I'll send emails making it look like they came from her and make her look like a complete stalker.
Professional corporate bullshitter right here.
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Old 03-29-2011, 01:12 PM   #24
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U fucked...
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Old 03-29-2011, 01:18 PM   #25
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ummm, so you're publicly admitting you don't work in online adult?
What are you doing for work these days?
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Old 03-29-2011, 01:18 PM   #26
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Maybe its time to work adult full time
or get some Good headphones?
or your own office?
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Old 03-29-2011, 01:43 PM   #27
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What are you doing for work these days?
:
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Old 03-29-2011, 01:47 PM   #28
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In this thread: the six people who haven't yet seen the Rebecca Black video! :P
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Old 03-29-2011, 02:10 PM   #29
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who the shit is rebecca black?
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Old 03-29-2011, 02:11 PM   #30
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Some people work day jobs to finance their online ventures. He could work mainstream during the day and adult online at night.
I never understood the point in doing that. It's like working at a department store hoping to start a world wide fashion label.
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Old 03-29-2011, 02:32 PM   #31
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gaaa

lol @ the replies
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Old 03-29-2011, 02:58 PM   #32
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I never understood the point in doing that. It's like working at a department store hoping to start a world wide fashion label.
Actually I think it's a great idea to work in a department store if you are hoping to start a world wide fashion label. There's nothing like experience on the ground level and understanding buyers and the distribution of the clothing. And knowing what people want and like. Just like people working in restaurants that eventually own one have a better chance of succeeding since they know the business from the ground up...not just buying into a concept and hoping it works out.

He could be a web developer / designer at his mainstream job and work nights doing the same thing, only for adult online. Who knows, I haven't had a jobby job for as long as I could remember so I could be way off base here. This is simply my opinion.
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Old 03-29-2011, 03:02 PM   #33
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I never understood the point in doing that. It's like working at a department store hoping to start a world wide fashion label.
Really?

It's not always the easiest thing to get your dream job and bills still have to be paid. Gotta start somewhere, so why not start in something that's related to the field you ultimately want to end up in?
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Old 03-29-2011, 04:12 PM   #34
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In this thread: the six people who haven't yet seen the Rebecca Black video! :P
I know who she is, just wondering whether it's all fo' real and you got a bit sidetracked at the end, or she's the new Fresh Prince story template.
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Old 03-29-2011, 04:15 PM   #35
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great story lOL!
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