Play the game like the rest of us. So what would you guys do if you won the big prize? I'd buy a laptop and put the rest asside for Vegas Internext

There's a really good brother 5 minutes from here..

:question :eek7

sure buddy......NOT!!!

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her room-mate.

"Terrible!" the room-mate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."

"Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?"

"He was the original owner!"

What are you listening to now?

Jeff Foxworthy DVD for me.

A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store."

"But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom....I'll show you how."

A student comes to a young professor's office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she whispers, "... I would do... anything."

He returns her gaze. "Anything?"

"Anything."

His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you... study?"

bump

almost there :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

1050!

The instructor was demonstrating the wonders of static electricity to his class at MIT. While holding a plastic rod in one hand and a wool cloth in the other, he told the class, "You can see that I get a large charge from rubbing my rod..."

That was pretty much the end of learning for that day.

almost 2000 posts for me :)

:1orglaugh Thats great!!

... How do you count number of posts???

In some foreign country a Athens State Priest, a University of Alabama Lawyer and an Auburn Engineer are about to be guillotined. The Priest puts his head on the block, they pull the rope and nothing happens. He declares that he's been saved by divine intervention, so he's let go.

The Lawyer is put on the block, and again the rope doesn't release the blade. He claims he can't be executed twice for the same crime and he too, is set free.

They grab the Auburn Engineer and shove his head into the guillotine, he looks up at the release mechanism and says, "Wait a minute, I see your problem..."

:1orglaugh

50 posts per page. Or you can look at the main site for a count.

Now Playing: "Illusion, Coma, Pimp and Circumstance" - Prince

Auburn is really getting made fun of.

:-) ... old but cool:-)

YES!!

Now Playing: "Musicology" - Prince

Prince is so awesome.

Why are rectal thermometers banned at Auburn University?
They cause too much brain damage.

How do you break an Auburn guy's finger?
Punch him in the nose.

Why did the Auburn student marry the cow?
He had to.

How can you tell when there's been an Auburn student in your backyard?
The garbage is gone and your dog's pregnant.

What is the definition of safe sex down at Auburn?
Placing a sign on the animals that kick...

How do you castrate an Auburn football player?
You hit his sister in the jaw.

How do you compliment an Auburn fan?
Nice tooth.

How can you tell your getting close to Auburn?
If you stop to take a piss the cows will back up to the fence.

What is the definition of an Auburn virgin?
An ugly twelve year old who can outrun her brothers

...You're right:-) ... I am little bit drunk:-)

An American College Graduate was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories.

A week later the grad complained to the doctor that they didn't produce the desired results. "Have you been taking them regularly?" the doctor asked.

"What do you think I've been doing," the grad said, "Shoving them up my ass?"

DUDE! Thats mean. :1orglaugh

what a nice joke

You guys/gurls telling stories? :)

:Oh crap

Some may be, but most are just jokes.

hi

TEXAS WISDOM



1. Never slap a man who's chewin' tobacco.

2. Good judgment comes from experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

3. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in.

4. If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

5. If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

6. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

7. There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

8. If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

9. Don't squat with your spurs on.

10. It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

11. Always drink upstream from the herd.

12. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

13. There are three kinds of people: The ones that learn by reading, the few who learn by observation, and the rest of them who have to touch the fire to see for themselves if it's really hot.

And sometimes it comes in combinations.

:ugone2far

YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM IDAHO WHEN...



- The wind is faster than your truck.

- Every other vehicle is a 4x4.

- When the sun goes down you start looking for your coat.

- In March, your vehicle is 43% mud.

- You leave your keys in the car and the next morning it's still there.

- You installed your new computer using a Leatherman tool.

- You hear the words "stream" or "brook" pronounced "crick."

- The elevation exceeds the population.

- You've broken down on the highway and somebody stops to help you.

- You can see the stars at night.

- People drive 200 miles to shop in a real mall.

- Your great grandmother is older than the courthouse.

- You got a set of snow tires for Valentines Day.

- The bumper jack in your pickup will lift a house.

- Your back yard smells like sagebrush or various animals.

- A girls' basketball game fills the gym.

- You slept through the night unawakened by a siren.

- A rodeo is more popular than a rock concert.

- You can fish, golf, and go skiing all in the same day if you try hard enough.

- Yellow light means "follow the car in front of you no matter what."

- Democrats are like salmon, they are on the endangered species list.

- You wave to someone on the freeway because you recognize the truck.

- You talk about a combine and people don't wonder what you are putting together.

- In the spring, every tenth car you pass is a tractor.

- When the car in front of you is weaving you suspect a farmer instead of a drunk.

- Maps and gloves are kept in your vehicle's "jocky box."

- You can choose plastic bags or paper sacks for your groceries.

- You have to wait for a flock of sheep to pass you on the road.

- You know why people pay money to watch "pig wrestling."

*does bad white girl dance to Prince*

yabadabadou !

coolone got a lot of time to loose