lets help you guys out...

A backward poet writes... inverse.

Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

saturday football rules.

The definition of a will?... (It's a dead giveaway).

This thread must be a sig whore spam fest :warning

In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

:banana

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia ... the LAN down under.

still haven't gotten a reply from you yet....

He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

Every calendar's days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

"Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle." - Bob Hope

He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

A plateau is a high form of flattery.

A midget fortuneteller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

Once you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

That is a great offer, good luck to everyone participating.

Don't worry if you don't know what eschatology is; it's not the end of the world.

Putting prepositions at the end of a sentence is a practice up with which we shall not put.

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"

Get the last word in: Apologise.