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Welcome to the GoFuckYourself.com - Adult Webmaster Forum forums. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today! If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us. |
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| Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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05-20-2004, 07:09 PM
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#2451 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. You get to park in the handicap zone.
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05-20-2004, 07:09 PM
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#2452 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
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05-20-2004, 07:10 PM
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#2453 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Pregnant
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05-20-2004, 07:11 PM
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#2454 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a 747?
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05-20-2004, 07:11 PM
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#2455 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Not everyone has been in a 747?
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05-20-2004, 07:12 PM
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#2456 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What's the difference between butter and a blonde?
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05-20-2004, 07:12 PM
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#2457 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Tampa
Posts: 1,477
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This contest SUCKS!
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05-20-2004, 07:12 PM
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#2458 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Butter is difficult to spread.
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05-20-2004, 07:13 PM
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#2459 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
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05-20-2004, 07:14 PM
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#2460 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Pull the pin and throw it back.
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05-20-2004, 07:14 PM
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#2461 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
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05-20-2004, 07:15 PM
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#2462 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Artificial intelligence.
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05-20-2004, 07:15 PM
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#2463 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head?
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05-20-2004, 07:16 PM
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#2464 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. A brunette with bad breath.
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05-20-2004, 07:17 PM
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#2465 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do blondes and cow shit have in common?
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05-20-2004, 07:17 PM
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#2466 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. The older they get
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05-20-2004, 07:18 PM
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#2467 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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the easier they are to pick up.
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05-20-2004, 07:18 PM
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#2468 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. How does a blond turn on the light after sex?
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05-20-2004, 07:19 PM
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#2469 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. She opens the car door.
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05-20-2004, 07:20 PM
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#2470 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
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05-20-2004, 07:20 PM
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#2471 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!
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05-20-2004, 07:21 PM
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#2472 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What does a blonde say the last two words of the national anthem are?
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05-20-2004, 07:21 PM
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#2473 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Play ball!
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05-20-2004, 07:22 PM
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#2474 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. What do smart blondes and UFO's have in common?
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05-20-2004, 07:23 PM
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#2475 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. You always hear about them but never see them.
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05-20-2004, 07:23 PM
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#2476 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
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05-20-2004, 07:24 PM
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#2477 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. Cause it said concentrate.
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05-20-2004, 07:24 PM
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#2478 |
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stc is the greatest
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: rip sean murray
Posts: 12,403
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posting sucks
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05-20-2004, 07:25 PM
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#2479 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. They know how many went down on the Titanic.
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05-20-2004, 07:26 PM
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#2480 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer?
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05-20-2004, 07:26 PM
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#2481 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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A. The joystick is wet.
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05-20-2004, 07:27 PM
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#2482 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,996
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Q. Why do blondes wear underwear?
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05-20-2004, 07:27 PM
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#2483 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Inside a 40oz of Budweizer
Posts: 1,103
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post
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05-20-2004, 07:32 PM
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#2484 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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Two hobbits walk into a bar where one of them picks up a barfly. They taker her to ta local motel; the first hobbit goes into the motel room while the other waits outside. Once the door closes, the hobbit on the outside hears starnge noises through the door, "I can't do it, I can't do it, I CAN'T DO IT!"
In the morning, the second hobbit askes the first, "How did it go?" The first one answers. "It was embarrassing. I simply couldn''t do it." The second hobbit shook his head. "Manhood problems, eh?" "No. I couldnt get on the bed!"
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My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce! 
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05-20-2004, 07:32 PM
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#2485 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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10 Things In Golf That Sound Dirty
1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.
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My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:34 PM
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#2486 |
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Doing the grind since 99
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 16,881
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User Posts
Thomas1007 375 Damn someone sure wants the money.
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Living in Virtual Reality Contact: Email (preferred): furiousmale .at. gmail - Skype: live:shanedws |
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05-20-2004, 07:34 PM
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#2487 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father replies, ''Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night.''
The son then asks his father, ''What's the 6-pack for?'' The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning.'' Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for. The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for January, one for February, one for March, one for.....''
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:36 PM
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#2488 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" "I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line." "Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:36 PM
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#2489 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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Why does a man's penis have a hole in it?
So he can get oxygen to his brain.
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:38 PM
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#2490 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing.
''Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're giving me too much. I've started growing hair in places that I've never grown hair before.'' The doctor reassured her, ''A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has this hair appeared?'' ''On my testicles, which is something else I want to talk to you about...,'' replied the lady.
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My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:40 PM
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#2491 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine." The barber began to lather his face and sharpen the old straight edge while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes.
The cowboy said, "Young lady, you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room." She replied, "I'm married and my husband wouldn't like that. The cowboy said, "Tell him you're working overtime and I'll pay you the difference." She said, "You tell him. He is the one shaving you."
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:41 PM
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#2492 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A woman keeps asking her husband if her boobs are so small. ''Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?'' she asks.
The next day her husband buys her a mirror. Before bed, she always looks in the mirror and asks her husband, ''Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?'' Finally he gets so annoyed that he says, ''I know how to make them larger!'' ''How!?!?!?'' she asks. ''Take a bunch of toilet paper and rub it in between your boobs.'' ''Well how long does it take?'' she asks. ''They should expand over the years,'' he answers. ''How did you know that?'' she wonders. ''I dunno, but it sure worked for your ass, didn't it?'''
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:42 PM
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#2493 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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The new minister's wife had a baby. The minister appealed to the congregation for a salary increase to cover the addition to the family. The congregation agreed that it was only fair, and approved it. When the next child arrived, the minister appealed and again the congregation approved the increase. Several years and five children later, the congregation was a bit upset over the increasing expenses. This turned into a rather loud meeting one night with the minister.
Finally, the minister stood up and shouted "Having children is an Act of God!" An older man in the back stood and shouted back "So are rain and snow, but we wear rubbers for them!"
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:43 PM
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#2494 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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Q: Who made the first soft drink?
A: Adam -- he made Eve's cherry pop
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:43 PM
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#2495 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her.
Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful? God: So you will always want to look at her. Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft? God: So you will always want to touch her. Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good? God: So you will always want to be near her. Adam: That's wonderful Lord, and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid? God: So she would love you.
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:44 PM
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#2496 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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One day God came to Adam and said, ''I've got some good news and some bad news."
''Well, give me the good news first.'' ''I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have wonderful conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your new intelligent life form and populate this planet.'' Adam, very excited, exclaimed, ''These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?'' ''The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time.
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:45 PM
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#2497 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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A couple has returned from their honeymoon and it was obvious to everyone that they are not talking to each other. The groom's best man takes him aside and asks what's wrong.
"Well," replied the man "when we had finished making love on the first night, as I got up to go to the bathroom, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking." "Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," said his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough - she can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years!" The groom nodded gently and said, "I don't know if I can get over this though: She gave me $20 change!''
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:46 PM
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#2498 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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Q. Why is air a lot like sex?
A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:47 PM
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#2499 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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An Egyptian man is walking through the Cairo bazaar, when a stranger comes up to him and offers to sell Viagra (illegal in Egypt) for 100 Egyptian pounds.
"No, not worth it!" "OK, how about 50 Egyptian pounds?" "No, not worth it!" "OK, 20?" "No, not worth it!" "How about 10?" "No, not worth it!" "Listen, these pills cost US $10 each. How can you say they are not worth it?" "Oh, the pills ARE worth it. My wife is not worth it."
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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05-20-2004, 07:47 PM
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#2500 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: African Safari
Posts: 5,310
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Your mama''''s glasses are so thick that when she lookes on a map she can see people waving.
__________________
My Ex-husband SKULL-BUITRE ran off to Colombia with OUR money and screwed me after I helped him build OUR business. He is hiding in Colombia and never paid the settlement $ from our divorce!
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