"Women should be obscene and not heard."
Groucho Marx.

Yo mama's so fat, when she fills up the tub, she fills up the tub.

the looser it gets! :1orglaugh :Graucho *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.

Get a free 10k site see the details :thumbsup

"Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult."
Charlotte Whitton.

A. Frosted Flakes :mad: :ak47: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued."

Why do blondes wear big hoop earrings when they go on a date?
So they have some place to put their feet.
:1orglaugh

Q. What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel? :BangBang: :feels-hot *-

haha nice

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all work at the same office for a female boss who always goes home early.
"Hey, girls," says the brunette, "let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know."

So the next day, they all leave right after the boss does. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss! She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time.

"That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime."

"No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught."

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets out of the car, she leaves stretch marks.

A. An airbag. :BangBang: :feels-hot *-

"Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself."
Roseanne Barr.

Why doesn't the blonde want to drink beer on the beach?
Because she doesn't want to get sand in her Busch

Q. How can you tell a blonde has had a bad day? :mad: :ak47: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate

One day, a blonde named Sally was putting together a puzzle. She was really stumped and very frustrated, so she decided to ask her husband for help.

''It's supposed to be a tiger!'' Sally cried.

''Honey," said Dan, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box!''

"Women: Can't live with them, can't bury them in the back yard without the neighbours seeing."
Sean Williamson.

A. She has a tampon tucked under her ear and she can't find her pencil. :thumbsup :winkwink: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she even orders "Thank You, Come Again."

Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake.
One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?"

"You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

"Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilt and I'll show you a man."
Erica Jong.

Q. What does the Bermuda Triangle and a blonde have in common? :thumbsup :winkwink: *-

Why do blondes like cars with adjustable steering wheels?
Because they like more head room

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy, Free Willy."

"As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied."
Oscar Wilde.

This is true :)

''Have you heard my knock-knock joke?'' asked the blonde.
''No,'' said the brunette.

''Okay,'' said the blonde, ''you start.''
:1orglaugh

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks "Where can I try that on?"

Q. What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board? :BangBang: :feels-hot *-

Why did the blonde take a ladder into the bar?
She heard the drinks were on the house.
:1orglaugh

"When women go wrong, men go right after them."
Mae West.

Yo mama's so fat, when she got on the bus she turned it into a low rider.

Q: What do you call a hundred blondes stacked up on each other?
A: An air mattress.

A. Its difficult to open the legs on an ironing board. :1orglaugh :Graucho *-

:1orglaugh

Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help.

How do you keep a blonde busy? (see below)
How do you keep a blonde busy? (see above)

"She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven."
Joan Rivers.

Q. How did the blonde burn her nose? :thumbsup :winkwink: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: ''I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!''
The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, ''You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!''

Yo mama's so fat, when she leaves the beach everybody shouts "The coast is clear."

LOL

Q. What do you call a zit on a blondes ass? :thumbsup :winkwink: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she opens the refrigerator, it says "I give up!"

A. Brain tumor. :thumbsup :winkwink: *-

Yo mama's so fat, when she ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her a dinosaur.

Why do brunettes know so many blonde jokes?
Gives 'em something to do on Saturday night!