Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes.

:waaaaahh A. Look inside your pants; if you have a penis :waaaaahh

looks like its still open:)

Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit

:stoned it's not time. :question

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you have the words "Foxy Lady" or a playboy bunny painted on your land speeder.

:arcadefre Q: Did you hear about the Irishman born with two left feet? :angel

Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you bought hanging air fresheners for your friend's X-Wing at Christmas time.

:drinkup A: He went out one day to buy some Flip Flips... :sadcrying

:eek2 Q: How do you ruin St. Paddy's day for an Irishman? :pimp

Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings":
* The Engagement Ring
* The Wedding Ring
* The Suffe-Ring
* The Endu-Ring

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you use the "O" on stop signs to sight in your new blaster.

Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
* In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
* In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
* In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

:question A: Make him the designated driver. :smokin

:pimp Q: What's green and bounces off the walls? :mad:

It is true that love is blind but marriage is definitely an eye-opener

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you wished that Admiral Ackbar was swimming in the pond on your farm back home.

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you call the Emporer "That old ugly dude in the house coat." :1orglaugh

:evil-laug Q. Did you hear Clinton doesn't use bookmarks? :tongue:

Profile For Jolly Rancher Search for all posts by this user.

Date Registered: 05-17-2004
Status: Too lazy to set a custom title
Total Posts: 1289 (280.63 posts per day)

:feels-hot A. He just bends over the pages.... :thefinger

fucking bots

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . your favorite bar caters primarily to smugglers and bounty hunters. :Graucho

lol

:warning A. Pour Gas on a Cat :rainfro

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you think that Jabba the Hutt really knows how to pick up good looking chicks. :Graucho

:Graucho and throw a match at it........ WOOF. :repuke

:disgust A. Stick a Dog in a freezer for a day :eyecrazy

Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you've got a stuffed womp rat from Begger's Canyon on your mantle. :glugglug

:glugglug

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . your initiation into the Rebellion required parallel parking the Millenium Falcon. :winkwink:

:Kissmy Q. What did the sea say to the shore? :feels-hot

Old Indian Trick
A Cowboy riding down the trail encounters an Indian laying on the trail with hard on. The Cowboy asks "what are you doing?" Indian says" Me tellum time."Cowboy shakes his head, rides on, encounters another exactly the same.Says "You telling time?"yup" "how can you tell time like that?" Indian says "workum like sundial, readum shadow".Cowboy, incredulous, rides on. Encounters Indian in trail masturbating.Cowboy says "let me guess, you're telling time too." Indian says " Nope. But me windum clock!

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you've ever given someone a wedgie by using the force. :helpme

so you like it here:winkwink:

:spawn Q. What's the similarity between a woman and a guitar? :winkwink:

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . you're flying a ship that has no original parts. :321GFY

Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at the top of a slide. The magician than said, ''You may each go down the slide, asking for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide you shall land a a huge glass of that drink.
The first man went down yelling, ''Beerrr!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of beer.

The second guy went down the slide yelling,''lemonadeee!!!'' Plop! He landed in a glass of lemonade.

The third guy went down the slide yelling ''wheeeeeeeee!!!'''

:disgust A. You play at the top and finger the bottom... :Buck:

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . parts of a TIE fighter you blew up hang as a trophy in your living room. :)

:Hollering Q. What's the similarity between a woman and a bank? :321GFY

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . your blind date was arranged through an invitation written on a cantina napkin. :glugglug

:waaaaahh A. After withdrawal :repuke

What is 40 feet long and smells like urine?
Line dancing at the nursing home

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . people mistake your house for a jawa used droids and speeder parts dealership. :(

:Buck: Q. How do you make out if a guy's gay? :ugone2far

Did you hear about the 80-pound guy with the 40-pound testicles?
People say he was half-nuts!

You Might Be A Redneck Jedi If . . .
. . . the cake at your wedding was sliced with a light saber. :)